Wednesday, May 25, 2011

AAADD... Thanks Carol & Clay Vice!

AAADD




KNOW THE SYMPTOMS



Thank goodness there's a name for this disorder.

Somehow I feel better even though I have it!!



Recently, I was diagnosed with A.A.A.D.D.

Age Associated Attention Deficit Disorder.



This is how it manifests:



I decide to water my garden.

As I turn on the hose in the driveway,

I look over at my car and decide it needs washing.



As I start toward the garage,

I notice mail on the porch table that

I brought up from the mail box earlier.



I decide to go through the mail before I wash the car.

I lay my car keys on the table,

put the junk mail in the garbage can under the table,

and notice that the can is full.



So I decide to put the bills back on the table & take out the garbage first.

But then I think, since I'm going to be near the mailbox

when I take out the garbage anyway,

I may as well pay the bills first.



I take my check book off the table,

and see that there is only one check left.

My extra checks are in my desk in the study,

so I go inside the house to my desk where

I find the can of Pepsi I'd been drinking.



I'm going to look for my checks,

but first I need to push the Pepsi aside

so that I don't accidentally knock it over.

The Pepsi is getting warm.



I decide to put it in the refrigerator to keep it cold.

As I head toward the kitchen with the Pepsi,

a vase of flowers on the counter catches my eye.



They need water.

I put the Pepsi on the counter and

discover my reading glasses that

I've been searching for all morning.





I decide I better put them back on my desk,

but first I'm going to water the flowers.

I set the glasses back down on the counter,

fill a container with water and suddenly spot the TV remote

someone had left it on the kitchen table.



I realize that tonight when we go to watch TV,

I'll be looking for the remote,

but I won't remember that it's on the kitchen table,

so I decide to put it back in the den where it belongs..



But first I'll water the flowers.

I pour some water in the flowers.

Quite a bit of it spills on the floor.

So, I set the remote back on the table,

get some towels and wipe up the spill.



Then I head down the hall trying to remember what I was planning to do.



At the end of the day:

the car isn't washed

the bills aren't paid

there is a warm can of

Pepsi sitting on the counter

the flowers don't have enough water,

there is still only 1 check in my check book,

I can't find the remote,

I can't find my glasses,

and I don't remember what I did with the car keys.





Then, when I try to figure out why nothing got done,

I'm really baffled because I know I was busy all damn day,

and I'm really tired.



I realize this is a serious problem,

and I'll try to get some help for it, but first I'll check my e-mail.....



Do me a favor.

Forward this message to everyone you know,

because I don't remember who the hell I've sent it to.



Don't laugh -- if this isn't you yet, your day is coming!!

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