Wednesday, May 2, 2012

Truisms ... Yep! Thanks Judi C.!




Subject: TRUISMS ........ Yep!




Truisms
It's not whether you win or lose,
but how you place the blame.
You are not drunk
if you can lie on the floor
without holding on.
We have enough "youth" .How about a fountain of "smart"?
A Fool and his money
can throw one heck of a party
When blondes have more fun, do they know it?
LEARN FROM YOUR PARENTS' MISTAKES
USE BIRTH CONTROL
Money isn't everything,
but it sure keeps the kids in touch.
Don't Drink and Drive
You might hit a bump and spill something
If at first you don't succeed
skydiving is not for you
Reality is only an illusion
that occurs due to a lack of alcohol.
We are born naked, wet and hungry.
Then things get worse.
Red meat is not bad for you
Fuzzy green meat is bad for you
.
Ninety-nine percent of all lawyers
give the rest a bad name.
Xerox and Wurlitzer will merge
to produce reproductive organs.
ARTIFICIAL INTELLIGENCE IS NO
MATCH FOR NATURAL STUPIDITY.
The latest survey shows that
three out of four people make
up 75% of the population
"You know why a banana is like a politician?" "He comes in and first he is green, then he turns yellow and then he's rotten."
"I think Congressmen should wear uniforms, you know, like NASCAR drivers, so we could identify their corporate sponsors."
The reason Politicians try so hard to get re-elected
is that they would 'hate' to have to make a living
under the laws they've passed.


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