Bacon Tree

       The Bacon Tree

Two Mexicans are stuck in the desert after crossing into the United States, wandering aimlessly and starving.  They are about to just lie down and await death when all of a sudden Luis says, "Hey Pepe, do you smell what I smell?  Ees bacon, I theenk."

"Ees, Luis, eet sure smell like bacon."

With renewed hope they struggle up the next sand dune, and there, in the distance, is a tree loaded with bacon.  There's raw bacon, there's fried bacon, back bacon, double-smoked bacon ... Every imaginable kind of cured pork.

"Pepe, Pepe, wees saved!  Ees a bacon tree!"

"Luis, maybe ees a meerage?  Wees in the desert don't forget."

"Pepe, since when deed you ever hear of a meerage that smell like bacon ... ees no meerage, ees a bacon tree!"

And with that, Luis staggers towards the tree.  He gets to within 5 feet.  Pepe, is crawling close behind, when suddenly a machine gun opens up and Luis drops like a wet sock.  Mortally wounded, he warns Pepe with his dying breath.

"Pepe... Go back, man, you was right, ees not a bacon tree!"

"Luis, Luis mi amigo... what ees it? "

"Pepe.. ees not a bacon tree.   

Ees....

Ees.....

Ees....

Ees....

Ees...

Ees....

Ees..... a ham bush...."

SORRY.  I know there's something wrong with me for sending you this.  Just couldn't help it.  Little voices made me do it !