There once was a pervert named Weiner who had a perverted demeanor.
Forced from the Hill For acting like Bill, now Congress is one weiner leaner.
Saturday, June 25, 2011
For my friends, Ron Walters and Bob Looney
At dawn the telephone rings, "Hello, Senor Rod? This is Ernesto, the
caretaker at your country house."
"Ah yes, Ernesto. What can I do for you? Is there a problem?"
"Um, I am just calling to advise you, Senor Rod, that your parrot, he
is dead".
"My parrot? Dead? The one that won the International competition?"
"Si, Senor, that's the one."
"Damn! That's a pity! I spent a small fortune on that bird. What did he
die from?"
"From eating the rotten meat, Senor Rod."
"Rotten meat? Who the hell fed him rotten meat?"
"Nobody, Senor. He ate the meat of the dead horse."
"Dead horse? What dead horse?"
"The thoroughbred, Senor Rod."
"My prize thoroughbred is dead?"
"Yes, Senor Rod, he died from all that work pulling the water cart."
"Are you insane? What water cart?"
"The one we used to put out the fire, Senor."
"Good Lord! What fire are you talking about, man?"
"The one at your house, Senor! A candle fell and the curtains caught
on fire."
"What the hell? Are you saying that my mansion is destroyed because of
a candle?!"
"Yes, Senor Rod."
"But there's electricity at the house! What was the candle for?"
"For the funeral, Senor Rod."
"WHAT BLOODY FUNERAL??!!"
"Your wife's, Senor Rod". She showed up very late one night and I
thought she was a thief, so I hit her with your new Ping G15 204g titanium head
golf club with the TFC 149D graphite shaft."
SILENCE........... LONG SILENCE.........VERY LONG SILENCE.
"Ernesto, if you broke that driver, you're in deep shit."
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caretaker at your country house."
"Ah yes, Ernesto. What can I do for you? Is there a problem?"
"Um, I am just calling to advise you, Senor Rod, that your parrot, he
is dead".
"My parrot? Dead? The one that won the International competition?"
"Si, Senor, that's the one."
"Damn! That's a pity! I spent a small fortune on that bird. What did he
die from?"
"From eating the rotten meat, Senor Rod."
"Rotten meat? Who the hell fed him rotten meat?"
"Nobody, Senor. He ate the meat of the dead horse."
"Dead horse? What dead horse?"
"The thoroughbred, Senor Rod."
"My prize thoroughbred is dead?"
"Yes, Senor Rod, he died from all that work pulling the water cart."
"Are you insane? What water cart?"
"The one we used to put out the fire, Senor."
"Good Lord! What fire are you talking about, man?"
"The one at your house, Senor! A candle fell and the curtains caught
on fire."
"What the hell? Are you saying that my mansion is destroyed because of
a candle?!"
"Yes, Senor Rod."
"But there's electricity at the house! What was the candle for?"
"For the funeral, Senor Rod."
"WHAT BLOODY FUNERAL??!!"
"Your wife's, Senor Rod". She showed up very late one night and I
thought she was a thief, so I hit her with your new Ping G15 204g titanium head
golf club with the TFC 149D graphite shaft."
SILENCE........... LONG SILENCE.........VERY LONG SILENCE.
"Ernesto, if you broke that driver, you're in deep shit."
This email was cleaned by emailStripper, available for free from http://www.papercut.biz/emailStripper.htm
Number 3
Proof that you can't underestimate the creativeness of Canadian boys for mischief.
Considering all the brilliant, devious minds we had in high school, I don't know how we missed doing this.
At a high school in Saskatchewan, a group of students played a prank....they let three goats loose inside the school.
But before turning them loose, they painted numbers on the sides of the goats: 1, 2, and 4.
School Administrators spent most of the day looking for No. 3.
Considering all the brilliant, devious minds we had in high school, I don't know how we missed doing this.
At a high school in Saskatchewan, a group of students played a prank....they let three goats loose inside the school.
But before turning them loose, they painted numbers on the sides of the goats: 1, 2, and 4.
School Administrators spent most of the day looking for No. 3.
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