George Bush, Queen Elizabeth, and Vladimir Putin all die
and go to Hell.
Upon arrival and while being checked in, they spot a red phone
and ask what the phone is for.
The devil tells them it is for calling back to Earth.
Putin asks to call Russia and talks for 5 minutes.
When he is finished the devil informs him that the cost is a
million dollars, so Putin writes him a check.
Next Queen Elizabeth calls England and talks for 30 minutes.
When she is finished the devil informs her that the cost is 6
million dollars, so she writes him a check.
Finally George Bush gets his turn and talks for 4 hours. When he
is finished the devil informs him that the cost is $5.00.
When Putin hears this he goes ballistic and asks the devil why
Bush got to call the USA so cheaply.
The devil smiles and replies, "Since Obama took over, the
country has gone to Hell, so it's a local call."
Sunday, July 31, 2011
Xenos- Means "hospitality" SamKat
Xenos Church in Westerville:
Hypocritical Christian and devoted Tea Party that I be as a Christian conservative, please indulge my Sunday morning's musings.
First off, PhD. Lee Campbell (filling in for M.D. Jeff Gordon) brought a lesson from John 17 explaining Glory this morning. Dr. Campbell's explained purpose is to give glory to God. Christ was God's gift to all Christians so that they may share eternity with Him in Heaven.
Nearly sacriligiously, 610 AM radio has a Sunday morning talk show in which Larry Larson has been part of for the last few years. This morning was Larry's last show and the call in testimonials were nearly unbelievable from notable sports people. Larry has brought glory to many in the local sports area, particularly the outstanding high school athletes he has interviewed. The man has been consistently positive in his many relationships and notable after notable has said so.
Kegleys are just common people who have been privileged to know Larry through our teacher-coach son, Jeff. I believe he gives the quiet Christian testimonial by being the person without just saying so.
Larry's adored wife, Jeanie, admonished him to look forward not backwards, just before her death to cancer a few years ago. He does that daily.
Larry's glory goes to Jesus and His Father, God, in my humble opinion.
Thank you Larry Larson!
SamKat
Hypocritical Christian and devoted Tea Party that I be as a Christian conservative, please indulge my Sunday morning's musings.
First off, PhD. Lee Campbell (filling in for M.D. Jeff Gordon) brought a lesson from John 17 explaining Glory this morning. Dr. Campbell's explained purpose is to give glory to God. Christ was God's gift to all Christians so that they may share eternity with Him in Heaven.
Nearly sacriligiously, 610 AM radio has a Sunday morning talk show in which Larry Larson has been part of for the last few years. This morning was Larry's last show and the call in testimonials were nearly unbelievable from notable sports people. Larry has brought glory to many in the local sports area, particularly the outstanding high school athletes he has interviewed. The man has been consistently positive in his many relationships and notable after notable has said so.
Kegleys are just common people who have been privileged to know Larry through our teacher-coach son, Jeff. I believe he gives the quiet Christian testimonial by being the person without just saying so.
Larry's adored wife, Jeanie, admonished him to look forward not backwards, just before her death to cancer a few years ago. He does that daily.
Larry's glory goes to Jesus and His Father, God, in my humble opinion.
Thank you Larry Larson!
SamKat
Obamacare explained by Trump ... Thanks Doug Brooke!
ØbamaCare Explained"
No one can sum it up better than Trump!
Let me get this straight . . . .. We're going to be "gifted" with a health care
plan we are forced to purchase and
fined if we don't, Which purportedly covers at least
ten million more people,
without adding a single new doctor,
but provides for 16,000 new IRS agents,
written by a committee whose chairman
says he doesn't understand it,
passed by a Congress that didn't read it but
exempted themselves from it, and signed by a president who smokes, with funding administered by a treasury chief who
didn't pay his taxes, for which we'll be taxed for four years before any
benefits take effect, by a government which has
already bankrupted Social Security and Medicare, all to be overseen by a surgeon general
who is obese, and financed by a country that's broke!!!!!
“What the hell could
possibly go wrong?”
Øbama, you’re fired!!!
No one can sum it up better than Trump!
Let me get this straight . . . .. We're going to be "gifted" with a health care
plan we are forced to purchase and
fined if we don't, Which purportedly covers at least
ten million more people,
without adding a single new doctor,
but provides for 16,000 new IRS agents,
written by a committee whose chairman
says he doesn't understand it,
passed by a Congress that didn't read it but
exempted themselves from it, and signed by a president who smokes, with funding administered by a treasury chief who
didn't pay his taxes, for which we'll be taxed for four years before any
benefits take effect, by a government which has
already bankrupted Social Security and Medicare, all to be overseen by a surgeon general
who is obese, and financed by a country that's broke!!!!!
“What the hell could
possibly go wrong?”
Øbama, you’re fired!!!
Little girl on an airplane ... Thanks Marge Rusnak!
*LITTLE GIRL ON AN AIR PLANE*
An atheist was seated next to a little girl on an
airplane and he turned to her and said, "Do you want to
talk? Flights go quicker if you strike up a conversation
with your fellow passenger."
The little girl, who had just started to read her book,
replied to the total stranger, "What would you want to
talk about?"
“Oh, I don't know," said the atheist. "How about why
there is no God, or no Heaven or Hell, or no life after
death?" as he smiled smugly.
"OK," she said. "Those could be interesting topics but
let me ask you a question first. A horse, a cow, and a
deer all eat the same stuff - grass. Yet a deer excretes
little pellets, while a cow turns out a flat patty, but
a horse produces clumps. Why do you suppose that is?"
The atheist, visibly surprised by the little girl's
intelligence, thinks about it and says, "Hmmm, I have no
idea."
To which the little girl replies, "Do you really feel
qualified to discuss why there is no God, or no Heaven
or Hell, or no life after death, when you don't know shit?"
And then she went back to reading her book.
An atheist was seated next to a little girl on an
airplane and he turned to her and said, "Do you want to
talk? Flights go quicker if you strike up a conversation
with your fellow passenger."
The little girl, who had just started to read her book,
replied to the total stranger, "What would you want to
talk about?"
“Oh, I don't know," said the atheist. "How about why
there is no God, or no Heaven or Hell, or no life after
death?" as he smiled smugly.
"OK," she said. "Those could be interesting topics but
let me ask you a question first. A horse, a cow, and a
deer all eat the same stuff - grass. Yet a deer excretes
little pellets, while a cow turns out a flat patty, but
a horse produces clumps. Why do you suppose that is?"
The atheist, visibly surprised by the little girl's
intelligence, thinks about it and says, "Hmmm, I have no
idea."
To which the little girl replies, "Do you really feel
qualified to discuss why there is no God, or no Heaven
or Hell, or no life after death, when you don't know shit?"
And then she went back to reading her book.
Medicare coverage in a nutshell ... Thanks Sarah Rapp!
MEDICARE COVERAGE IN A NUTSHELL
The phone rings and the lady of the house answers, 'Hello..'
'Mrs. Sanders, please.'
'Speaking.'
'Mrs.. Sanders, this is Doctor Jones at Saint Agnes Laboratory. When your husband's doctor sent his biopsy to the lab last week, a biopsy from another Mr. Sanders arrived as well. We are now uncertain which one belongs to your husband. Frankly, either way the results are not too good.'
'What do you mean?' Mrs.. Sanders asks nervously.
'Well, one of the specimens tested positive for Alzheimer's and the other one tested positive for HIV.... We can't tell which is which.'
'That's dreadful! Can you do the test again?', questioned Mrs. Sanders..
'Normally we can, but Medicare will only pay for these expensive tests one time.'
'Well, what am I supposed to do now?'
'The folks at Medicare recommend that you drop your husband off somewhere in the middle of town . . If he finds his way home . . don't sleep with him.'
The phone rings and the lady of the house answers, 'Hello..'
'Mrs. Sanders, please.'
'Speaking.'
'Mrs.. Sanders, this is Doctor Jones at Saint Agnes Laboratory. When your husband's doctor sent his biopsy to the lab last week, a biopsy from another Mr. Sanders arrived as well. We are now uncertain which one belongs to your husband. Frankly, either way the results are not too good.'
'What do you mean?' Mrs.. Sanders asks nervously.
'Well, one of the specimens tested positive for Alzheimer's and the other one tested positive for HIV.... We can't tell which is which.'
'That's dreadful! Can you do the test again?', questioned Mrs. Sanders..
'Normally we can, but Medicare will only pay for these expensive tests one time.'
'Well, what am I supposed to do now?'
'The folks at Medicare recommend that you drop your husband off somewhere in the middle of town . . If he finds his way home . . don't sleep with him.'
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