We have First Class, Business Class, and No Class.
Our prices can’t be beaten...but our passengers can.
We put the hospital in hospitality.
We beat our passengers, not the competition.
We have an offer you can’t refuse. No, really.
Board as a doctor, leave as a patient.
Not enough seating? Prepare for a beating.
And you thought legroom was an issue.
Proudly offering Admiral’s Club, Captain’s Club, and Fight Club.
If our staff need a seat, we’ll drag you out by your feet.
Good news: We’re serving free meals again. Bad news: It’s a knuckle sandwich.
We treat you like we treat your luggage.
Fight or flight.
You may have patients, but we don’t have patience.
We have red-eye and black-eye flights available.
We’ll even hit a guy with glasses.
Now serving free punch.
Clearly, the TSA failed in its mission to prevent people from being attacked on planes.
