Thx Dr. Ralph H Chemical Engineer - Engineer

Sam Kegley

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Engineers 1 message

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Ralph	Sat, Aug 20, 2016 at 1:02 PM
To: Ralph
Subject:  Engineers Two engineering students were biking across a university campus when one said,  "Where did you get such a great bike?" The second engineer replied, "Well, I was walking along yesterday, minding my own business, when a beautiful woman rode up on this bike, threw it to the ground, took off all her clothes and said, "Take what you want." The first engineer nodded approvingly and said, "Good choice: The clothes probably wouldn't have fit you anyway." Understanding Engineers #2:  To the optimist, the glass is half-full. To the pessimist, the glass is half-empty. To the engineer, the glass is twice as big as it needs to be.  Understanding Engineers #3:  A priest, a doctor, and an engineer were waiting one morning for a particularly slow group of golfers. The engineer fumed, "What's with those guys? We must have been waiting for fifteen minutes!" The doctor chimed in, "I don't know, but I've never seen such inept golf!" The priest said, "Here comes the greens-keeper. Let's have a word with him." He said, "Hello George, What's wrong with that group ahead of us? They're rather slow, aren't they?" The greens-keeper replied, "Oh, yes. That's a group of blind firemen. They lost their sight saving our clubhouse from a fire last year, so we always let them play for free anytime!" The group fell silent for a moment. The priest said, "That's so sad. I think I will say a special prayer for them tonight." The doctor said, "Good idea. I'm going to contact my ophthalmologist colleague and see if here's anything she can do for them." The engineer said, "Why can't they play at night?"  Understanding Engineers #4:  What is the difference between mechanical engineers and civil engineers? Mechanical engineers build weapons. Civil engineers build targets.  Understanding Engineers #5:  The graduate with a science degree asks, "Why does it work?" The graduate with an engineering degree asks, "How does it work?" The graduate with an accounting degree asks, "How much will it cost?" The graduate with an arts degree asks, "Do you want fries with that?”  Understanding Engineers #6:  Normal people believe that if it ain't broke, don't fix it. Engineers believe that if it ain't broke, it doesn't have enough features yet.  Understanding Engineers #7:  An engineer was crossing a road one day, when a frog called out to him and said, "If you kiss me, I'll turn into a beautiful princess." He bent over, picked up the frog, and put it in his pocket. The frog spoke up again and said, "If you kiss me, I'll turn back into a beautiful princess and stay with you for one week." The engineer took the frog out of his pocket, smiled at it and returned it to the pocket. The frog then cried out, "If you kiss me and turn me back into a princess, I'll stay with you for one week and do anything you want." Again, the engineer took the frog out, smiled at it and put it back into his pocket. Finally, the frog asked, "What is the matter? I've told you I'm a beautiful princess and that I'll stay with you for one week and do anything you want. Why won't you kiss me?" The engineer said, "Look, I'm an engineer. I don't have time for a girlfriend, but a talking frog - now that's cool."  And finally:  Two engineers were standing at the base of a flagpole, looking at its top. A woman walked by and asked what they were doing. "We're supposed to find the height of this flagpole," said Sven, "but we don't have a ladder." The woman took a wrench from her purse, loosened a couple of bolts, and laid the pole down on the ground. Then she took a tape measure from her pocketbook, took a measurement, announced, "Twenty one feet, six inches," and walked away. One engineer shook his head and laughed, "A lot of good that does us. We ask for the height and she gives us the length!" Both engineers have since quit their engineering jobs and are currently serving as elected members of Congress.

o's "Capitalism Failed" speech in Texas, Kansas

Pamela Geller reported obama's teleprompter speech in her "Atlas Shrugs" blog today.  It is very long, but it is a speech we will be hearing until November 2012- the 'progressivist battle cry' that makes obama's heritage appear to be part of America's greatness.  The man is a narcissistic, compulsive liar.

Thomas Jefferson said:  "That government is best which governs least."  obama believes that socialism is much superior to capitalism.  We citizens used to get sixty-eight cents back for each dollar we sent to the federal governent.  I don't know the current citizen return on the dollar figure, but I am sure it is much less in this overgrown tumor which is Washington.  Government doesn't create wealth except for the non-representative controllists that are part of government such as obama. pelosi, and their greedy ilk and any, democrat or republican who has been in office far too long.  As Gary Burbank, a great American always said in one of his WLW 700 characters, "Wake up America!"  But not to this egotistical compulsive liar's return to the presidency of the United States of America.

Give us Any Man or Any Woman who will oppose the changing of America to socialism or communism, the great failures of the twentieth centur.

It is no secret that our negotiated collectivism, rose us to 13 week vacations, $30 an hour factory work, plush jobs, gave American factories to overseas countries.  Strong american markets, weak management and strong unionism did that. Thirty dollars an hour plus benefits gave way to $10 an hour in Japan, $1 in Mexico, and 25 cents an hour in China and Taiwan.  Is it any wonder that goods are made by copying the engineering and capitalistic successes built here in America?  No, it is absolutely no wonder.  Two plus two still makes four, no matter the math used by progressives.  Government services devour  far too much from our economy.

We want neither  progressives, left nor right, running our great country into the grips of another dictator, in the style of Stalin, Hitler, Chavez, nor Cuba's 'savior'.  This over-zealous obama person would love to be the dictator of the entire world of socialistic countries.

A wonderful black friend confided to me yesterday that those who receive without working become dependent and dilatory-example- over forty million Americans now on food stamps.  Nancy Pelosi believes this is a great stimulation to American economy - more food stamps.  Incentivism to job creation?  NOT!

Go to "Atlas Shrugs" for the Texas Kansas speech of 'little o'.