My view made 2600, Clay. I've checked in 2400 times. I haven't counted, and have no way to count yours.
Thanks my esteemed publicist!
Sunday, May 17, 2009
Thanks Phyllis Sparks! Can't eat e-mail
Can't eat pork,
Swine flu...
Can't eat chicken,
Bird flu...
Can't eat Beef,
Mad cow...
Can't eat eggs,
Salmonella...
Can't eat fish,
heavy metal poisons in their waters...
Can't eat fruits and veggies,
insecticides and herbicides...
Hmmmmmmmmm!!!!!
M
M
M
M
M
M
M
M
M
M
M
I believe that leaves
Chocolate and ice cream!!!
Remember...
'STRESSED' spelled backwards
is 'DESSERTS'!
Send this to four people
and you will lose 2 pounds
Delete it and you will
gain 10 pounds immediately!
That's why I had to pass this on...
I didn't want to risk it!
And I wanted to put a smile on your face.
Swine flu...
Can't eat chicken,
Bird flu...
Can't eat Beef,
Mad cow...
Can't eat eggs,
Salmonella...
Can't eat fish,
heavy metal poisons in their waters...
Can't eat fruits and veggies,
insecticides and herbicides...
Hmmmmmmmmm!!!!!
M
M
M
M
M
M
M
M
M
M
M
I believe that leaves
Chocolate and ice cream!!!
Remember...
'STRESSED' spelled backwards
is 'DESSERTS'!
Send this to four people
and you will lose 2 pounds
Delete it and you will
gain 10 pounds immediately!
That's why I had to pass this on...
I didn't want to risk it!
And I wanted to put a smile on your face.
Great day recipe- Deemers and Paul & Mary
----- Original Message -----
From: KglyKg@aol.com
To: skegley@columbus.rr.com
Sent: Saturday, May 16, 2009 10:46 PM
Subject: Fwd: FW: Great Recipe for a Great Day!...
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
From: mjdeemer@hotmail.com
Take a 10-30 minute walk every day. And while you walk, smile. It is the ultimate anti-depressant.
2. Sit in silence for at least 10 minutes each day. Talk to God about what is going on in your life. Buy a lock if you have to.
3. When you wake up in the morning complete the following statement, 'My purpose is to__________ today. I am thankful for______________'
4. Eat more foods that grow on trees and plants and eat less food that is manufactured in plants.
5. Drink green tea and plenty of water. Eat blueberries, wild Alaskan salmon, broccoli , almonds & walnuts.
6. Try to make at least three people smile each day.
7. Don't waste your precious energy on gossip, energy vampires, issues of the past, negative thoughts or things you cannot control.
Instead invest your energy in the positive present moment.
8. Eat breakfast like a king, lunch like a prince and dinner like a college kid with a maxed out charge card.
9. Life isn't fair, but it's still good.
10. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone.
11. Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does.
12. You are not so important that you have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.
13. Make peace with your past so it won't spoil the present.
14. Don't compare your life to others. You have no idea what their journey is all about.
15. No one is in charge of your happiness except you.
16. Frame every so-called disaster with these words: 'In five years, will this matter?'
17. Forgive everyone for everything.
18. What other people think of you is none of your business.
19. GOD heals everything - but you have to ask Him.
20. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.
21. Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your friends will. Stay in touch!!!
22. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.
23. Each night before you go to bed complete the following statements: I am thankful for__________. Today I accomplished_________.
24. Remember that you are too blessed to be stressed.
25. When you are feeling down, start listing your many blessings. You'll be smiling before you know it.
Send this to everyone you care about.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
From: KglyKg@aol.com
To: skegley@columbus.rr.com
Sent: Saturday, May 16, 2009 10:46 PM
Subject: Fwd: FW: Great Recipe for a Great Day!...
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
From: mjdeemer@hotmail.com
Take a 10-30 minute walk every day. And while you walk, smile. It is the ultimate anti-depressant.
2. Sit in silence for at least 10 minutes each day. Talk to God about what is going on in your life. Buy a lock if you have to.
3. When you wake up in the morning complete the following statement, 'My purpose is to__________ today. I am thankful for______________'
4. Eat more foods that grow on trees and plants and eat less food that is manufactured in plants.
5. Drink green tea and plenty of water. Eat blueberries, wild Alaskan salmon, broccoli , almonds & walnuts.
6. Try to make at least three people smile each day.
7. Don't waste your precious energy on gossip, energy vampires, issues of the past, negative thoughts or things you cannot control.
Instead invest your energy in the positive present moment.
8. Eat breakfast like a king, lunch like a prince and dinner like a college kid with a maxed out charge card.
9. Life isn't fair, but it's still good.
10. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone.
11. Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does.
12. You are not so important that you have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.
13. Make peace with your past so it won't spoil the present.
14. Don't compare your life to others. You have no idea what their journey is all about.
15. No one is in charge of your happiness except you.
16. Frame every so-called disaster with these words: 'In five years, will this matter?'
17. Forgive everyone for everything.
18. What other people think of you is none of your business.
19. GOD heals everything - but you have to ask Him.
20. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.
21. Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your friends will. Stay in touch!!!
22. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.
23. Each night before you go to bed complete the following statements: I am thankful for__________. Today I accomplished_________.
24. Remember that you are too blessed to be stressed.
25. When you are feeling down, start listing your many blessings. You'll be smiling before you know it.
Send this to everyone you care about.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Wednesday, May 13, 2009
Columbo to Obama
From a good and trusted friend:
Columbo to Obama:
Ah . Sorry to bother you Mr. Obama, Sir. .
Excuse me Mr. Obama, I mean President Obama, Sir. Um . . I know you're busy, and important and stuff. I mean running the county is very important and -- ah -- I hate to bother you Sir. I will only take a minute. Ok Sir?
See, I have these missing pieces that are holding me up, and I was wondering Sir, if you could take time out of your busy schedule and help me out. You know, no big deal, just some loose ends and things.
Hey, you have a nice place here! The wife sees houses like this on TV all the time and says boy she wishes she had digs like this you know? Is that painting real? Really? Wow. I saw something like that in a museum once!
Oh, sorry Sir. I didn't mean to get off the track. So if you could just help me out a minute and give me some details, I will get right out of your way. I want to close this case and maybe take the wife to Coney Island or something. Ever been to Coney Island Sir? No? I didn't think so...
Well, listen, anyway, I can't seem to get some information I need to wrap this up. These things seem to either be "Not released" or "Not available." I'm sure it's just an oversight or glitch or something, so if you could you tell me where these things are -- I -- I have them written down here somewhere -- oh wait. Sorry about the smears. It was raining out. I'll just read it to you.
Could you please help me find these things Sir?
1. Occidental College records -- Not released
2. Columbia College records -- Not released
3. Columbia Thesis paper -- "Not available"
4. Harvard College records -- Not released
5. Selective Service Registration -- Not released
6. Medical records -- Not released
7. Illinois State Senate schedule -- Not available
8. Your Illinois State Senate records -- Not available
9. Law practice client list -- Not released
10. Certified Copy of original Birth certificate -- Not released
11. Embossed, signed paper Certification of Live Birth -- Not released
12. Record of your baptism -- Not available
Oh and one more thing Senator, I can't seem to find any articles you published as editor of the Harvard Law Review, or as a Professor at the University of Chicago. Can you explain that to me Sir?
Oh but, hey -- listen! I know you're busy! If this is too much for you right now -- I mean -- tell you what. I'll come back tomorrow. Give you some time to get these things together, You know? I mean, I know you're busy. I'll just let myself out. I'll be back tomorrow. And the day after. .
What's that Mr. President? Who wants to know these things?
We the People of the United States of America ! You know, the ones that vote.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Hotmail® has ever-growing storage! Don’t worry about storage limits. Check it out.
Columbo to Obama:
Ah . Sorry to bother you Mr. Obama, Sir. .
Excuse me Mr. Obama, I mean President Obama, Sir. Um . . I know you're busy, and important and stuff. I mean running the county is very important and -- ah -- I hate to bother you Sir. I will only take a minute. Ok Sir?
See, I have these missing pieces that are holding me up, and I was wondering Sir, if you could take time out of your busy schedule and help me out. You know, no big deal, just some loose ends and things.
Hey, you have a nice place here! The wife sees houses like this on TV all the time and says boy she wishes she had digs like this you know? Is that painting real? Really? Wow. I saw something like that in a museum once!
Oh, sorry Sir. I didn't mean to get off the track. So if you could just help me out a minute and give me some details, I will get right out of your way. I want to close this case and maybe take the wife to Coney Island or something. Ever been to Coney Island Sir? No? I didn't think so...
Well, listen, anyway, I can't seem to get some information I need to wrap this up. These things seem to either be "Not released" or "Not available." I'm sure it's just an oversight or glitch or something, so if you could you tell me where these things are -- I -- I have them written down here somewhere -- oh wait. Sorry about the smears. It was raining out. I'll just read it to you.
Could you please help me find these things Sir?
1. Occidental College records -- Not released
2. Columbia College records -- Not released
3. Columbia Thesis paper -- "Not available"
4. Harvard College records -- Not released
5. Selective Service Registration -- Not released
6. Medical records -- Not released
7. Illinois State Senate schedule -- Not available
8. Your Illinois State Senate records -- Not available
9. Law practice client list -- Not released
10. Certified Copy of original Birth certificate -- Not released
11. Embossed, signed paper Certification of Live Birth -- Not released
12. Record of your baptism -- Not available
Oh and one more thing Senator, I can't seem to find any articles you published as editor of the Harvard Law Review, or as a Professor at the University of Chicago. Can you explain that to me Sir?
Oh but, hey -- listen! I know you're busy! If this is too much for you right now -- I mean -- tell you what. I'll come back tomorrow. Give you some time to get these things together, You know? I mean, I know you're busy. I'll just let myself out. I'll be back tomorrow. And the day after. .
What's that Mr. President? Who wants to know these things?
We the People of the United States of America ! You know, the ones that vote.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Hotmail® has ever-growing storage! Don’t worry about storage limits. Check it out.
Monday, May 11, 2009
Southern Women- Dr. Ralph Hovermale e-mail
Subject: Southern Women! Love it!
Southern women appreciate their natural assets:
Clean skin.
A winning smile.
That unforgettable Southern drawl.
Southern women know their manners:
"Yes, ma'am."
"Yes, sir."
"Why, no, Billy!"
Southern women have a distinct way with fond expressions :
"Y'all come back!"
"Well, bless your heart."
"Drop by when you can.."
"How's your Momma?"
Southern women know their summer weather report:
Humidity
Humidity Humidity
Southern women know their vacation spots:
The beach
The rivuh
The crick
Southern women know the joys of June, July, and August:
Colorful hi-heel sandals
Strapless sun dresses
Iced sweet tea with mint
Straw hats and big sunglasses
Southern women know everybody's first name:
Honey
Darlin'
Shugah
Southern women know the movies that speak to their hearts:
Fried Green Tomatoes
Divine Secrets of the Ya-Ya Sisterhood
Ste el Magnolias
Gone With The Wind
Southern women know their religions:
Baptist
Methodist
Football
Southern women know their country breakfasts:
Red-eye gravy
Grits
Eggs
Country ham
Mouth-watering homemade biscuits with momma's homemade jelly
Southern women know their cities dripping with Southern
charm:
Chawl'stn
S'vanah
Foat Wuth
N'awlins
Addlanna
Southern girls know their prime real estate:
The Mall
The Country Club
The Beauty Salon
Southern girls know the 3 deadly sins:
Having bad hair and nails
Having bad manners
Cooking bad food
More Suth en-ism's:
Only a Southerner knows the difference between a hissie fit and a conniption
fit, and that you don't "HAVE" them, you "PITCH" them.
___
Only a Southerner knows how many fish, collard greens, turnip greens, peas,
beans, etc., make up "a mess."
___
Only a Southerner can show or point out to you the general direction of
"yonder."
___
Only a Southerner knows exactly how long "directly" is, as in: "Going to
town, be back directly."
___
Even Southern babies know that "Gimme some sugar" is not a request for the
white, granular sweet substance that sits in a pretty little bowl in the
middle of the table.
___
All Southerners know exactly when "by and by" is. They might not use the
term, but they know the concept well.
___
Only a Southerner knows instinctively that the best gesture of solace for a
neighbor whose got trouble is a plate of hot fried chicken and a big bowl
of cold potato salad. If the neighbor's trouble is a real crisis, they also
know to add a large banana puddin!
___
Only Southerners grow up knowing the difference between "right near" and "a
right far piece. "They also know that "just down the road" can be 1 mile or
20.
___
Only a Southerner both knows and understands the difference between a
redneck, a good ol' boy, and po' white trash.
___
No true Southerner would ever assume that the car with the flashing turn
signal is actually going to make a turn.
___
A Southerner knows that "fixin" can be used as a noun, a verb, or an
adverb.
___
Only Southerners make friends while standing in lines, ..... and when we're
"in line," we talk to everybody!
___
In the South, y'a ll is singular, all y'all is plural.
___
Southerners know grits come from corn and how to eat them.
___
Every Southerner knows tomatoes with eggs, bacon, grits, and coffee are
perfectly wonderful; that red eye gravy is also a breakfast food; and that
fried green tomatoes are not a breakfast food.
___
When you hear someone say, "Well, I caught myself lookin'," you know you are
in the presence of a genuine Southerner!
___
Only true Southerners say "sweet tea," "sweet milk," and "light bread"...
Sweet tea indicates the need for sugar and lots of it -- we do not like our
tea unsweetened. "Sweet milk" means you don't want buttermilk. And "Light
bread" is white bread.
___
And a true Southerner knows you don't scream obscenities at little old
ladies who drive 30 MPH on the freeway. You just say,"Bless her heart" ...
and go your own way.
___
To those of you who are still a little embarrassed by your Southerness: Take
two tent revivals and a dose of sausage gravy and call me in the morning.
Bless your heart!
___
And to those of you who are still having a hard time understanding all this
Southern stuff, .... bless your hearts, I hear they are fixin' to have
classes on Southernness as a second language!
___ ;
And for those that are not from the South but have lived here for a long
time, all y'all need a sign to hang on y'alls front porch that reads "I
ain't from the South, but I got here as fast as I could."
Southern girls know men may come and go, but friends are fahevah!
Now... Shugah, s end this to someone who was raised in the South or wish
they had been!
If you're a Northern transplant, Bless your little heart, fake it.
We know you got here as fast as you could.
Southern women appreciate their natural assets:
Clean skin.
A winning smile.
That unforgettable Southern drawl.
Southern women know their manners:
"Yes, ma'am."
"Yes, sir."
"Why, no, Billy!"
Southern women have a distinct way with fond expressions :
"Y'all come back!"
"Well, bless your heart."
"Drop by when you can.."
"How's your Momma?"
Southern women know their summer weather report:
Humidity
Humidity Humidity
Southern women know their vacation spots:
The beach
The rivuh
The crick
Southern women know the joys of June, July, and August:
Colorful hi-heel sandals
Strapless sun dresses
Iced sweet tea with mint
Straw hats and big sunglasses
Southern women know everybody's first name:
Honey
Darlin'
Shugah
Southern women know the movies that speak to their hearts:
Fried Green Tomatoes
Divine Secrets of the Ya-Ya Sisterhood
Ste el Magnolias
Gone With The Wind
Southern women know their religions:
Baptist
Methodist
Football
Southern women know their country breakfasts:
Red-eye gravy
Grits
Eggs
Country ham
Mouth-watering homemade biscuits with momma's homemade jelly
Southern women know their cities dripping with Southern
charm:
Chawl'stn
S'vanah
Foat Wuth
N'awlins
Addlanna
Southern girls know their prime real estate:
The Mall
The Country Club
The Beauty Salon
Southern girls know the 3 deadly sins:
Having bad hair and nails
Having bad manners
Cooking bad food
More Suth en-ism's:
Only a Southerner knows the difference between a hissie fit and a conniption
fit, and that you don't "HAVE" them, you "PITCH" them.
___
Only a Southerner knows how many fish, collard greens, turnip greens, peas,
beans, etc., make up "a mess."
___
Only a Southerner can show or point out to you the general direction of
"yonder."
___
Only a Southerner knows exactly how long "directly" is, as in: "Going to
town, be back directly."
___
Even Southern babies know that "Gimme some sugar" is not a request for the
white, granular sweet substance that sits in a pretty little bowl in the
middle of the table.
___
All Southerners know exactly when "by and by" is. They might not use the
term, but they know the concept well.
___
Only a Southerner knows instinctively that the best gesture of solace for a
neighbor whose got trouble is a plate of hot fried chicken and a big bowl
of cold potato salad. If the neighbor's trouble is a real crisis, they also
know to add a large banana puddin!
___
Only Southerners grow up knowing the difference between "right near" and "a
right far piece. "They also know that "just down the road" can be 1 mile or
20.
___
Only a Southerner both knows and understands the difference between a
redneck, a good ol' boy, and po' white trash.
___
No true Southerner would ever assume that the car with the flashing turn
signal is actually going to make a turn.
___
A Southerner knows that "fixin" can be used as a noun, a verb, or an
adverb.
___
Only Southerners make friends while standing in lines, ..... and when we're
"in line," we talk to everybody!
___
In the South, y'a ll is singular, all y'all is plural.
___
Southerners know grits come from corn and how to eat them.
___
Every Southerner knows tomatoes with eggs, bacon, grits, and coffee are
perfectly wonderful; that red eye gravy is also a breakfast food; and that
fried green tomatoes are not a breakfast food.
___
When you hear someone say, "Well, I caught myself lookin'," you know you are
in the presence of a genuine Southerner!
___
Only true Southerners say "sweet tea," "sweet milk," and "light bread"...
Sweet tea indicates the need for sugar and lots of it -- we do not like our
tea unsweetened. "Sweet milk" means you don't want buttermilk. And "Light
bread" is white bread.
___
And a true Southerner knows you don't scream obscenities at little old
ladies who drive 30 MPH on the freeway. You just say,"Bless her heart" ...
and go your own way.
___
To those of you who are still a little embarrassed by your Southerness: Take
two tent revivals and a dose of sausage gravy and call me in the morning.
Bless your heart!
___
And to those of you who are still having a hard time understanding all this
Southern stuff, .... bless your hearts, I hear they are fixin' to have
classes on Southernness as a second language!
___ ;
And for those that are not from the South but have lived here for a long
time, all y'all need a sign to hang on y'alls front porch that reads "I
ain't from the South, but I got here as fast as I could."
Southern girls know men may come and go, but friends are fahevah!
Now... Shugah, s end this to someone who was raised in the South or wish
they had been!
If you're a Northern transplant, Bless your little heart, fake it.
We know you got here as fast as you could.
Saturday, May 9, 2009
Niceness Pat Richards Whitehead PHS 1950
Ever have one of those days, when something seems a bit 'off' but you just can't put your finger on it...
Or it seemed like all the people around you just wanted to butt heads...
Or just get into some kind of weird tug of war?
Sometimes you just need to take a fresh new look and get a different perspective on things.
Remember to try your best to show kindness to others...
(sometimes looking at things from their perspective might help.....)
So, when life gets you down...
Remember to just keep going, and keep your head above water...
And you'll get by with a little help from your friends!
To all of my friends and relatives, have a nice day.
Together We Can Make Someone Smile
Or it seemed like all the people around you just wanted to butt heads...
Or just get into some kind of weird tug of war?
Sometimes you just need to take a fresh new look and get a different perspective on things.
Remember to try your best to show kindness to others...
(sometimes looking at things from their perspective might help.....)
So, when life gets you down...
Remember to just keep going, and keep your head above water...
And you'll get by with a little help from your friends!
To all of my friends and relatives, have a nice day.
Together We Can Make Someone Smile
Thursday, May 7, 2009
New political party?
Is it time to form a real new political party.
The third parties have hardley mattered in previous USA voting history, but it is now time to form a new party in America. The incumbents who sit and sit and sit and repeat the errors of the past have served more than their time. Too much of our time.
The USA is not a holy nation, but it has been formed on Christian principles and should remAin in that vein.
Christians have been sitting on their haunches long enough. Let us form and regain the nation we have always been so proud of and that so many have been maimed or killed in battles to preserve.
I don't like the current trend and believe that there are suffficient patriots in our country to win back the country we love before it disintegrates before this generations' eyes.
The third parties have hardley mattered in previous USA voting history, but it is now time to form a new party in America. The incumbents who sit and sit and sit and repeat the errors of the past have served more than their time. Too much of our time.
The USA is not a holy nation, but it has been formed on Christian principles and should remAin in that vein.
Christians have been sitting on their haunches long enough. Let us form and regain the nation we have always been so proud of and that so many have been maimed or killed in battles to preserve.
I don't like the current trend and believe that there are suffficient patriots in our country to win back the country we love before it disintegrates before this generations' eyes.
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