Today's Bible Lesson ... Thx Blaine B!

---------- Forwarded message ---------

🤝

                           Today's Bible Lesson

  

In today's world with President Trump getting hit daily I decided a little Bible Lesson might be appropriate.

  

Remember what Jesus said: 'Goats on the left, sheep on the right' (Matthew 25:33). 
 
Jesus also told Peter that if he wanted to catch fish do it from the right side of the boat He did and filled the boat with fish. 
 
John 21:6 (NIV) ... He said, "Throw your net on the right side of the boat and you will find some." When they did, they were unable to haul the net in because of the large number of fish." 
 
Origin of Left & Right. I have often wondered why it is that Conservatives are called the "right" and Liberals are called the "left". 
 
By chance I stumbled upon this verse in the Bible: Ecclesiastes 10:2 (NIV) - "The heart of the wise inclines to the right, but the heart of the fool to the left." 
 
Thus sayeth the Lord. Amen 
 
It surely can't get any simpler than that. 
 
Spelling Lesson:

The last four letters in American......... I Can 
The last four letters in Republican........ I Can 
The last four letters in Democrats........ Rats 
 
End of lesson! ...Test to follow on November 6, 2018. 
 
Remember, November 2018 is to be set aside as rodent removal month. 

Please share this Bible Lesson with all your friends and email buddies to help achieve that goal. 
 
Never grow a wishbone where a backbone ought to be.

Reply to Text Messages

Marge, I find myself so dumb about today's electonic thing-a-ma- jigs, 

that I rarely text.  I also make too many typos.

A slip of the finger and the neighbor acts like a democrat.

We must vote soon for the right side of Congress!

  

Text Messages - Thx Marge R!

text messages…

Text message to neighbor:

Hi, Fred, this is Richard, next door.  I’ve got a confession to make.  I’ve been riddled with guilt for a few months and have been trying to get up the courage to tell you face-to-face.  At least I’m telling you in this text and I can’t live with myself a minute longer without you knowing about this.  The truth is that when you’re not around I’ve been sharing your wife, day and night.  In fact, probably much more than you.  I haven’t been getting it at home recently and I know that that’s no excuse.  The temptation was just too great.  I can’t live with the guilt and hope you’ll accept my sincere apology and forgive me.  Please suggest a fee for usage and I’ll pay you.  Regards, Richard

Neighbor’s response:

Fred, feeling so angered and betrayed, grabbed his gun and shot Richard, killing him.  He went back home and poured himself a stiff drink and sat down on the sofa.  Fred then looked at his phone and discovered a second text message from Richard.

Second text message:

Hi, Fred  Richard here again.  Sorry about the typo on my last text.  I expect you figured it out and noticed that the damned Auto-Correct had changed “wi-fi” to “wife.”  Technology, huh?  It’ll be the death of us all.  Regards, Richard

Townhall Daily... Thx Paul C!

Having trouble viewing this email? View it in your browser   Fresh, Conservative, Intelligent Reporting   |   Facebook      Twitter      Google      YouTube   Columnists Tipsheet News Cartoons Videos   Columnists What Do We Have In Common? Ben Shapiro Jon Tester: Vote Hunter Donald Trump Jr. The Most Important Movie You've Never Heard Of Michelle Malkin Socialism Destroys John Stossel Not Just Evidence—Empirical Research and Data Matter, Too Sheriff David Clarke (Ret.) Real Economics Walter E. Williams What Should Happen to Deputy AG Who Discussed Bugging Trump? Byron York Cardiologist: “This Is What Happens When You Eat A Steak" Sponsored by: Gundry MD The Senate's an 'Unfixable Crime Against Democracy'? Brent Bozell and Tim Graham Will Kavanaugh Realign Racial Politics? Star Parker Kavanaugh Confirmation Was Ugly, and Things Will Only Get Uglier Jonah Goldberg Stepping Closer To That “Thousand Years of Darkness” Reagan Warned Us About in 1964 Bob Barr Future Wealth: How Fortunes Will Be Made in the New Tech Revolution Jeff Brown The Argument Chuck Schumer Doesn't Have the Courage to Make Terry Jeffrey Dems' Socialist Ideas Will Tank Economy Betsy McCaughey Capitalism's Victory in Brazil Proves US Door-kicking Isn't Necessary Rachel Marsden What the Kavanaugh Protests and Kermit Gosnell Have in Common Rebecca Hagelin Evangelicals Can Disagree on Trump and Still Be Family  Michael Brown Preening Isn’t Just for Peacocks Horace Cooper Why the Executive Branch Shouldn't Legislate: Progressives Appreciate the Separation of Powers – Up to a Point Jacob Sullum Key FBI Witness Now Says Former Rep. Steve Stockman is Innocent Rachel Alexander Best and Worst Governors 2018 Chris Edwards The Front Lines of America’s ‘Uncivil War’ - A Trip to My Local Jewelry Store Myra Kahn Adams Trump Fulfills Phyllis Schlafly’s Vision John and Andy Schlafly The Future: Science and Self Destruction Michael Guillen  If Progressives Get Power… John P. Warren More Columnists   Video 'The Nutcracker And The Four Realms' CBS Show 'God Friended Me' Reveals What Happens if You Get a Friend Request from God 'Creed II' Trailer Reveals Adonis Creed's New Opponent Hurricane Florence Makes Landfall in the Carolinas