Welcome

Welcome to my blog http://www.skegley.blogspot.com/ . CAVEAT LECTOR- Let the reader beware. This is a Christian Conservative blog. It is not meant to offend anyone. Please feel free to ignore this blog, but also feel free to browse and comment on my posts! You may also scroll down to respond to any post.

For Christian American readers of this blog:


I wish to incite all Christians to rise up and take back the United States of America with all of God's manifold blessings. We want the free allowance of the Bible and prayers allowed again in schools, halls of justice, and all governing bodies. We don't seek a theocracy until Jesus returns to earth because all men are weak and power corrupts the very best of them.
We want to be a kinder and gentler people without slavery or condescension to any.

The world seems to be in a time of discontent among the populace. Christians should not fear. God is Love, shown best through Jesus Christ. God is still in control. All Glory to our Creator and to our God!


A favorite quote from my good friend, Jack Plymale, which I appreciate:

"Wars are planned by old men,in council rooms apart. They plan for greater armament, they map the battle chart, but: where sightless eyes stare out, beyond life's vanished joys, I've noticed,somehow, all the dead and mamed are hardly more than boys(Grantland Rice per our mutual friend, Sarah Rapp)."

Thanks Jack!

I must admit that I do not check authenticity of my posts. If anyone can tell me of a non-biased arbitrator, I will attempt to do so more regularly. I know of no such arbitrator for the internet.











Saturday, September 17, 2011

Jokes you can tell in church ... Thanks Judi cole!

JOKES THAT CAN BE TOLD IN CHURCH




Two boys were walking home from Sunday school



after hearing a strong preaching on the devil.



One said to the other, 'What do you think about



all this Satan stuff?'



The other boy replied, 'Well, you know how



Santa Claus turned out.



It's probably just your Dad.'



~~~~~~~~~~~~



Attending a wedding for the first time, a little girl



whispered to her mother,



'Why is the bride dressed in white?''



The mother replied, 'Because white is the color



of happiness,



and today is the happiest day of her life.'



The child thought about this for a moment then said,



'So why is the groom wearing black?'



~~~~~~~~~~~~



A little girl, dressed in her Sunday best, was running



as fast as she could,



trying not to be late for Bible class.



As she ran she prayed,



'Dear Lord, please don't let me be late! Dear Lord,



please don't let me be late!'



While she was running and praying, she tripped



on a curb and fell,



getting her clothes dirty and tearing her dress.



She got up, brushed herself off, and started running



again!



As she ran she once again began to pray,



'Dear Lord, please don't let me be late...But please



don't shove me either!'



~~~~~~~~~~~~



Three boys are in the school yard bragging about



their fathers.



The first boy says, 'My Dad scribbles a few words



on a piece of paper, he calls it a poem,



they give him $50.'



The second boy says, 'That's nothing. My Dad



scribbles a few words on piece of paper,



he calls it a song, they give him $100.'



The third boy says, 'I got you both beat. My Dad



scribbles a few words on a piece of paper,



he calls it a sermon, and it takes eight people to



collect all the money!'



~~~~~~~~~~~~



An elderly woman died last month.



Having never married, she requested no male



pallbearers.



In her handwritten instructions for her memorial



service, she wrote,



'They wouldn't take me out while I was alive,



I don't want them to take me out when I'm dead.'



~~~~~~~~~~~~

A police recruit was asked during the exam,



'What would you do if you had to arrest your own



mother?'



He answered, 'Call for backup.'



~~~~~~~~~~~~

A Sunday School teacher asked her class why



Joseph and Mary took Jesus with them to Jerusalem..



A small child replied, 'They couldn't get a baby-sitter.'



~~~~~~~~~~~~

A Sunday school teacher was discussing the Ten Commandments with her five and six year olds.



After explaining the commandment to 'Honor thy



father and thy mother,' she asked,



'Is there a commandment that teaches us how to



treat our brothers and sisters?'



Without missing a beat, one little boy answered,



'Thou shall not kill..'



~~~~~~~~~~~~

At Sunday School they were teaching how God



created everything, including human beings.



Little Johnny seemed especially intent when they



told him



how Eve was created out of one of Adam's ribs.



Later in the week his mother noticed him lying



down as though he were ill,



and she said, 'Johnny, what is the matter?' Little



Johnny responded,



'I have pain in my side. I think I'm going to have



a wife.'



~~~~~~~~~~~~



You don't stop laughing because you grow old..



You grow old because you stop laughing!



Take heed and pass these along to people who



need a laugh.



I thought you would enjoy this....times are tough



right now...for all of us...



so we need something to make the day a happy



place.



"They" haven't found a way to tax you for



laughing yet.



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