To all,
Wednesday, May 25, 2011
I'm sorry to report that Lea Duschinski fell at her Forest Heights Portsmouth home Monday evening, while sweeping her sidewalk, and according to her niece, Mary Saltsman, "shattered her left elbow, and cracked her head". The good news is, they did all the proper tests, and found no serious damage to her head. They surgically repaired her elbow on Tuesday afternoon, and had to add "a plate and eight screws", Mary reported. Lea is a HUGH Cincinnati Reds fan, and she and I celebrate wins, and commiserate defeats, whenever we talk.
Tuesday evening, I tried to telephone Lea to talk about the Reds' 6-3 victory over the Phillies, to break a slide of six losses, and got no answer. It was after 10 p.m., so I was surprised when Lea didn't answer her phone. I tried again a few minutes later, and let it ring for 20 or 30 times, still no Lea. I then called Violet (Vie) Gantz, her regular Thursday eveniing dinner partner, and Vie didn't know why she was not answering. I then called Mary Saltsman, and she told me the bad news. It is bad news, but it is not as bad as it could have been.
Mary speculated that she will be in a long recovery with her arm, but said Lea is right handed, so she will be able to write, etc.
Lea was secretary to several principals at Portsmouth High School, even though she is a graduate of Central Catholic, Lea has the singular distinction of being a fixture at summer PHS class reunions, because of her popularity, and ready wit. Lea has been retired longer than most people work one job. She is a virtual history book of information regarding the forties, fifties, sixties and seventies, as relates to Portsmouth High School, and stays in touch with many of her friends.
She is madly in love with Joey Votto, the first baseman of the Reds. I know she is happy for Votto's double off the wall in Tuesday's victory.
Go Reds!
Go Lea!
Get well quickly!
Lea's address is: Lea Duschinski
3201 South Taylor Court
Portsmouth, Ohio 45662
Keg
Wednesday, May 25, 2011
The gym The wisdom of Clay!
The Gym
An older man, not in the best physical condition, asked the Trainer in the gym, "I want to impress that beautiful girl. Which machine should I use?"
The trainer replied, "Use the ATM machine outside the gym!"
An older man, not in the best physical condition, asked the Trainer in the gym, "I want to impress that beautiful girl. Which machine should I use?"
The trainer replied, "Use the ATM machine outside the gym!"
FW- Italian Mother
Italian Mother
Rocco excitedly tells his mother he's fallen in
love and that he is going to get married.
He says, 'Just for fun, Ma, I'm going to bring
over 3 women and you try and guess which one I'm going to marry.'
The mother agrees.
The next day, he brings three beautiful women
into the house and sits them down on the couch and they chat for a
while.
He then says, 'Okay, Ma, guess which one I'm
going to marry?'.
She immediately replies, 'The one on the right.'
That's amazing, Ma. You're right. How did you
know????'
The Italian mother replied: 'I don't like her.'
Rocco excitedly tells his mother he's fallen in
love and that he is going to get married.
He says, 'Just for fun, Ma, I'm going to bring
over 3 women and you try and guess which one I'm going to marry.'
The mother agrees.
The next day, he brings three beautiful women
into the house and sits them down on the couch and they chat for a
while.
He then says, 'Okay, Ma, guess which one I'm
going to marry?'.
She immediately replies, 'The one on the right.'
That's amazing, Ma. You're right. How did you
know????'
The Italian mother replied: 'I don't like her.'
FW- Holy Humor... Thanks Carol & clay!
These are really cute.
--HOLY HUMOUR
**A father was approached by his small son who told him proudly, "I know what the Bible means!"
His father smiled and replied, "What do you mean, you 'know' what the Bible means?
The son replied, "I do know!"
"Okay," said his father. "What does the Bible mean?"
"That's easy, Daddy..." the young boy replied excitedly," It stands for 'Basic Information Before Leaving Earth.' (This one is my favorite)
=======
There was a very gracious lady who was mailing an old family Bible to her brother in another part of the country.
"Is there anything breakable in here?" asked the postal clerk.
"Only the Ten Commandments." answered the lady.
========
"Somebody has said there are only two kinds of people in the world. There are those who wake up in the morning and say, "Good morning, Lord," and there are those who wake up in the morning and say, "Good Lord, it's morning."
========
A minister parked his car in a no-parking zone in a large city because he was short of time and couldn't find a space with a meter.
Then he put a note under the windshield wiper that read: "I have circled the block 10 times. If I don't park here, I'll miss my appointment. Forgive us our trespasses."
When he returned, he found a citation from a police officer along with this note "I've circled this block for 10 years. If I don't give you a ticket I'll lose my job. Lead us not into temptation."
========
There is the story of a pastor who got up one Sunday and announced to his congregation: "I have good news and bad news. The good news is, we have enough money to pay for our new building program. The bad news is, it's still out there in your pockets."
========
While driving in Pennsylvania , a family caught up to an Amish carriage. The owner of the carriage obviously had a sense of humor, because attached to the back of the carriage was a hand printed sign... "Energy efficient vehicle: Runs on oats and grass. Caution: Do not step in exhaust."
========
A Sunday School teacher began her lesson with a question, "Boys and girls, what do we know about God?"
A hand shot up in the air. "He is an artist!" said the kindergarten boy.
"Really? How do you know?" the teacher asked.
"You know - Our Father, who does art in Heaven... "
========
A minister waited in line to have his car filled with gas just before a long holiday weekend. The attendant worked quickly, but there were many cars ahead of him. Finally, the attendant motioned him toward a vacant pump.
"Reverend," said the young man, "I'm so sorry about the delay. It seems as if everyone waits until the last minute to get ready for a long trip."
The minister chuckled, "I know what you mean. It's the same in my business."
========
People want the front of the bus, the back of the church, and the center of attention.
========
Sunday after church, a Mom asked her very young daughter what the lesson was about.
The daughter answered, "Don't be scared, you'll get your quilt."
Needless to say, the Mom was perplexed. Later in the day, the pastor stopped by for tea and the Mom asked him what that morning's Sunday school lesson was about.
He said "Be not afraid, thy comforter is coming."
========
The minister was preoccupied with thoughts of how he was going to ask the congregation to come up with more money than they were expecting for repairs to the church building. Therefore, he was annoyed to find that the regular organist was sick and a substitute had been brought in at the last minute. The substitute wanted to know what to play.
"Here's a copy of the service," he said impatiently. "But, you'll have to think of something to play after I make the announcement about the finances."
During the service, the minister paused and said, "Brothers and Sisters, we are in great difficulty; the roof repairs cost twice as much as we expected and we need $4,000 more. Any of you who can pledge $100 or more, please stand up."
At that moment, the substitute organist played "The Star Spangled Banner."
And that is how the substitute became the regular organist!
========
When you carry the Bible, Satan gets a headache ... When you open it, he collapses ... When he sees you reading it, he faints ... When he sees that you are living what you read, he flees ... And when you are about to forward this message ... He will try and discourage you. I just defeated him!!! Any other takers?
--HOLY HUMOUR
**A father was approached by his small son who told him proudly, "I know what the Bible means!"
His father smiled and replied, "What do you mean, you 'know' what the Bible means?
The son replied, "I do know!"
"Okay," said his father. "What does the Bible mean?"
"That's easy, Daddy..." the young boy replied excitedly," It stands for 'Basic Information Before Leaving Earth.' (This one is my favorite)
=======
There was a very gracious lady who was mailing an old family Bible to her brother in another part of the country.
"Is there anything breakable in here?" asked the postal clerk.
"Only the Ten Commandments." answered the lady.
========
"Somebody has said there are only two kinds of people in the world. There are those who wake up in the morning and say, "Good morning, Lord," and there are those who wake up in the morning and say, "Good Lord, it's morning."
========
A minister parked his car in a no-parking zone in a large city because he was short of time and couldn't find a space with a meter.
Then he put a note under the windshield wiper that read: "I have circled the block 10 times. If I don't park here, I'll miss my appointment. Forgive us our trespasses."
When he returned, he found a citation from a police officer along with this note "I've circled this block for 10 years. If I don't give you a ticket I'll lose my job. Lead us not into temptation."
========
There is the story of a pastor who got up one Sunday and announced to his congregation: "I have good news and bad news. The good news is, we have enough money to pay for our new building program. The bad news is, it's still out there in your pockets."
========
While driving in Pennsylvania , a family caught up to an Amish carriage. The owner of the carriage obviously had a sense of humor, because attached to the back of the carriage was a hand printed sign... "Energy efficient vehicle: Runs on oats and grass. Caution: Do not step in exhaust."
========
A Sunday School teacher began her lesson with a question, "Boys and girls, what do we know about God?"
A hand shot up in the air. "He is an artist!" said the kindergarten boy.
"Really? How do you know?" the teacher asked.
"You know - Our Father, who does art in Heaven... "
========
A minister waited in line to have his car filled with gas just before a long holiday weekend. The attendant worked quickly, but there were many cars ahead of him. Finally, the attendant motioned him toward a vacant pump.
"Reverend," said the young man, "I'm so sorry about the delay. It seems as if everyone waits until the last minute to get ready for a long trip."
The minister chuckled, "I know what you mean. It's the same in my business."
========
People want the front of the bus, the back of the church, and the center of attention.
========
Sunday after church, a Mom asked her very young daughter what the lesson was about.
The daughter answered, "Don't be scared, you'll get your quilt."
Needless to say, the Mom was perplexed. Later in the day, the pastor stopped by for tea and the Mom asked him what that morning's Sunday school lesson was about.
He said "Be not afraid, thy comforter is coming."
========
The minister was preoccupied with thoughts of how he was going to ask the congregation to come up with more money than they were expecting for repairs to the church building. Therefore, he was annoyed to find that the regular organist was sick and a substitute had been brought in at the last minute. The substitute wanted to know what to play.
"Here's a copy of the service," he said impatiently. "But, you'll have to think of something to play after I make the announcement about the finances."
During the service, the minister paused and said, "Brothers and Sisters, we are in great difficulty; the roof repairs cost twice as much as we expected and we need $4,000 more. Any of you who can pledge $100 or more, please stand up."
At that moment, the substitute organist played "The Star Spangled Banner."
And that is how the substitute became the regular organist!
========
When you carry the Bible, Satan gets a headache ... When you open it, he collapses ... When he sees you reading it, he faints ... When he sees that you are living what you read, he flees ... And when you are about to forward this message ... He will try and discourage you. I just defeated him!!! Any other takers?
Tuesday, May 24, 2011
MY DAUGHTER, Lisa... Bob Looney
My single parent friend, Bob Looney, is a true American hero to me. The ex-Marine from Korean War days and retired postmaster of Portsmouth's Sciotoville, east of P'Town, withstood divorce to be the parental presence in his kid's lives as they matured. You can sense a lot of maturity in 12 year old Lisa's appreciation of her dad.
FW- Senior Texting Codes- Thanks Clay Vice!
Subject: Senior Texting Codes-
I needed texting shortcuts and thought you might too. Kids have
little codes like BFF, OMG, so why can't we?
Here are codes for seniors:
ATD - At the Doctor's
BFF - Best Friend's Funeral
BTW - Bring the Wheelchair
BYOT - Bring Your Own Teeth
CBM - Covered by Medicare
CUATSC - See You at the Senior Center
DWI - Driving While Incontinent
FWBB - Friend with Beta Blockers
FWIW - Forgot Where I Was
FYI - Found Your Insulin
GGPBL - Gotta Go, Pacemaker Battery Low
GHA - Got Heartburn Again
HGBM - Had Good Bowel Movement
IMHO - Is My Hearing-Aid On?
LMDO - Laughing My Dentures Out
LOL - Living on Lipitor
LWO - Lawrence Welk's On
OMMR - On My Massage Recliner
OMSG - Oh My! Sorry, Gas
ROFL...CGU - Rolling on the Floor Laughing...Can't get Up!
TTYL - Talk to You Louder
WAITT - Who Am I Talking To?
WTP - Where's the Prunes
WWNO - Walker Wheels Need Oil
Hope these help!
GGLKI - Gotta Go, Laxative Kicking in
I needed texting shortcuts and thought you might too. Kids have
little codes like BFF, OMG, so why can't we?
Here are codes for seniors:
ATD - At the Doctor's
BFF - Best Friend's Funeral
BTW - Bring the Wheelchair
BYOT - Bring Your Own Teeth
CBM - Covered by Medicare
CUATSC - See You at the Senior Center
DWI - Driving While Incontinent
FWBB - Friend with Beta Blockers
FWIW - Forgot Where I Was
FYI - Found Your Insulin
GGPBL - Gotta Go, Pacemaker Battery Low
GHA - Got Heartburn Again
HGBM - Had Good Bowel Movement
IMHO - Is My Hearing-Aid On?
LMDO - Laughing My Dentures Out
LOL - Living on Lipitor
LWO - Lawrence Welk's On
OMMR - On My Massage Recliner
OMSG - Oh My! Sorry, Gas
ROFL...CGU - Rolling on the Floor Laughing...Can't get Up!
TTYL - Talk to You Louder
WAITT - Who Am I Talking To?
WTP - Where's the Prunes
WWNO - Walker Wheels Need Oil
Hope these help!
GGLKI - Gotta Go, Laxative Kicking in
More Roy and Dale from Marge Rusnak!
Roy Rogers was raised in Scioto County (Portsmouth, Ohio) after his birth on a houseboat in Cincinnati, Ohio.. I have a copy of "Happy Trails"- Our Life Story. The couple did so much good in this world! God blesses the work of tremendous people as He graces them with salvation.
The following is from my friend, Marge Rusnak, in Washington, D.C. There- We almost forgot anything good could emanate from D.C. Thank you Marge!
Sam
Just a few interesting facts about Dale & Roy......
She was born in Uvalde TX.
They were married in Davis OK on New Year's Eve in 1947.
Her 4th marriage, his 3rd.
I have a copy of her 1st book ANGEL UNAWARE.....about their downs syndrome daughter.
I believe they adopted 2 children from Hope Cottage in Dallas.
HAPPY TRAILS!
GOD BLESS AMERICA
Begin forwarded message:
The following is from my friend, Marge Rusnak, in Washington, D.C. There- We almost forgot anything good could emanate from D.C. Thank you Marge!
Sam
Just a few interesting facts about Dale & Roy......
She was born in Uvalde TX.
They were married in Davis OK on New Year's Eve in 1947.
Her 4th marriage, his 3rd.
I have a copy of her 1st book ANGEL UNAWARE.....about their downs syndrome daughter.
I believe they adopted 2 children from Hope Cottage in Dallas.
HAPPY TRAILS!
GOD BLESS AMERICA
Begin forwarded message:
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