--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Subject: FW: Fwd: FW: Christian Humor!!!
Date: Thu, 29 Apr 2010 11:30:55 -0400
From: Dave Decker
Sent: Thursday, April 29, 2010 11:11 AM
Subject: FW: Fwd: FW: Christian Humor!!!
A Little Christian Humor
This is one of the best clean jokes I've seen in a while!
Jesus and Satan were having an on-going argument about who was better on the computer. They had been going at it for days, and frankly God was tired of hearing all the bickering.
Finally fed up, God said, 'THAT'S IT! I have had enough. I am going to set up a test that will run for two hours, and from those results, I will judge who does the better job.'
So Satan and Jesus sat down at the keyboards and typed away.
They moused.
They faxed.
They e-mailed.
They e-mailed with attachments.
They downloaded..
They did spreadsheets!
They wrote reports.
They created labels and cards..
They created charts and graphs..
They did some genealogy reports .
They did every job known to man.
Jesus worked with heavenly efficiency and Satan was faster than hell.
Then, ten minutes before their time was up, lightning suddenly flashed across the sky, thunder rolled, rain poured, and, of course, the power went off..
Satan stared at his blank screen and screamed every curse word known in the underworld.
Jesus just sighed..
Finally the electricity came back on, and each of them restarted their computers. Satan started searching frantically, screaming:
'It's gone! It's all GONE! 'I lost everything when the power went out!'
Meanwhile, Jesus quietly started printing out all of his files from the past two hours of work.
Satan observed this and became irate.
'Wait!' he screamed. 'That's not fair! He cheated! How come he has all his work and I don't have any?'
God just shrugged and said,
JESUS SAVES....
AMEN!!!!!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The New Busy think 9 to 5 is a cute idea. Combine multiple calendars with Hotmail. Get busy.
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The message was checked by ESET Smart Security.
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Friday, April 30, 2010
Army preps for Tea Party Terrorists- Thanks Alma!
Read this on the Web at http://patriotpost.us/alexander/2010/04/29/army-preps-for-tea-party-terrorists/
Alexander's Essay – April 29, 2010
Army Preps for Tea Party 'Terrorists'
"The duty imposed upon [the president] to take care, that the laws be faithfully executed, follows out the strong injunctions of his oath of office, that he will 'preserve, protect, and defend the constitution.' The great object of the executive department is to accomplish this purpose; and without it, be the form of government whatever it may, it will be utterly worthless for offence, or defence; for the redress of grievances, or the protection of rights; for the happiness, or good order, or safety of the people." --Justice Joseph Story
A few months back, the commander in chief or our Armed Forces, that erstwhile community organizer Barack Hussein Obama, denigrated a large cross section of Americans who identify with the Tea Party movement -- those who advocate for Essential Liberty and Rule of Law.
Obama identified them as malcontents, "waving their little tea bags."
Since then, the Obama administration and their Leftmedia sycophants have endeavored to characterize Tea Party attendees as rude, radical, racist, redneck, enemies of the state.
In fact, Americans who attend Tea Party rallies are from all walks of life, as noted in the Patriot Declaration, Patriots who are peacefully and constitutionally petitioning their government for redress.
As I noted in my tax-day essay, Tea Parties are "not a call for revolution but for restoration -- a call to undertake whatever measures are dictated by prudence and necessity to restore constitutional Rule of Law."
However, Obama's words do have consequences.
This week, I was contacted by a number of military personnel, enlisted and officer ranks, who expressed concern about a military exercise underway at Ft. Knox, the U.S. Bullion Depository. As with most such exercises, the Ft. Knox alert occurred in stages, as if real time intelligence was being provided at various intervals.
The first intel advisory was issued on Friday, 23 April 2010, and identifies the terrorist threat adversaries as "Local Militia Groups / Anti-Government Protesters / TEA Party."
You read that right: "TEA Party"!
The alert states that plans for the demonstration may have been interrupted by "Federal and local law enforcement" raids on a "White Supremacists Organization," but "TEA Party organizers have stated that they will protest at the Gold Vault at a future date."
Further, the intel advisory states, "Anti-Government - Health Care Protesters have stated that they would join the TEA Party as a sign of solidarity."
In accordance with the exercise, Ft. Knox post security is placed on high alert because, "these groups are armed, have combative training and some are former Military Snipers. Some may have explosives training / experience," and "a rally at their compound / training area is scheduled."
Another intel update was issued on Monday, 26 April 2010, noting that the "rally at the Militia compound occurred," and "Viable threats ... have been made." The intel on the rally notes, "Many members were extremely agitated at what they referred to as Government intervention and over taxation in their lives. Alcohol use 'fanned the flames.' Many military grade firearms were openly carried. An ad hoc 'shoot the government agent' event was held with prizes (alcohol) given for the best shot placement."
The report states further, "Components of bomb making are reported to have been on the site. Some members have criminal records relating to explosive and weapons violations."
In response to the "immediate threat," the exercise stipulates, "local detention centers are being made ready for mass arrests." Both the "QRF I and QRF II" are placed on two hour recall, and the "5-15 CAV" was ordered to "draw weapons from holder and store in most available arms room," and "coordinate with MASA for immediate ammunition draw; have equipment readied for immediate use, i.e. vehicles staged and loaded IAW 5-15 CAV SOP; LMR's charged."
QRF refers to Quick Reaction Force. QRF I is the 16th Cavalry Regiment. QRF II is the 194th Armored Brigade.
The 26 April order gives specific instructions for the 5-15 CAV (a 16th Cavalry battalion) to have weapons, ammo, vehicles and communications at ready, and it places the other 2,200 members of the units on two-hour recall. In other words, these orders are to gear up for defending Ft. Knox against Tea Party folks and their co-conspirators who oppose nationalization of our health care sector.
Now, for almost 30 years I have participated in the development and implementation of small and large scale military exercises within the U.S. and around the world.
Such exercises are critical to the readiness of our forces, and the standard for the real time intel reports in these drills requires thinly veiled references to assets of existing or collateral threat vectors such as communist regimes such as China and real terrorist networks such as al-Qa'ida, etc.
Perhaps the writers of such exercises today should focus on response plans for, say, an Islamic terrorist who attacks a post. (See Ft. Hood / Major Nidal Malik Hasan.)
The Ft. Knox exercise is not only amateurish in its construct, but also sets an ominous political precedent.
The military officers and enlisted personnel with whom I spoke are all dedicated uniformed Patriots who are loyal, first and foremost, to their oath to "support and defend" our Constitution "against all enemies, foreign and domestic."
Their concerns about this exercise mirrored my own. As one put it, the exercise "misrepresents freedom loving Americans as drunken, violent racists -- the opponents of Obama's policies have been made the enemy of the U.S. Army."
They were equally concerned that command staff at Ft. Knox had signed off on this exercise, noting, "it has been issued and owned by field grade officers who lead our battalions and brigades," which is to say many Lieutenant Colonels saw this order before it was implemented.
It's not likely that Ft. Knox Commanding General James Milano or Deputy Commander Col. David Teeples, or even the regimental and brigade commanders for the 16th Cav and 194th AB, actually read the exercise scenario, but that doesn't absolve responsibility for such an egregious example of political exploitation of U.S. forces.
One officer insisted, "The American people should require greater accountability of their commissioned officers, that they abide by their oath and never allow politically motivated propaganda like this exercise on any post or base again."
Another observed, "Whether this is complacency by officers who do not see such orders as a problem, or worse, officers who recognize the problem but do not insist the orders are changed, this is a serious problem. We are discussing the training of American citizen soldiers in the use of potentially deadly force against a specific group of political dissenters. There is never a time in an officer's career in which he does not have a duty to apply critical thought to the orders he is given and asked to give. It is my opinion that any officer that has allowed these orders to persist, to reach the level of junior officers and soldiers, has demonstrated a lack of judgment or apathy towards what his duty requires of him. Either way, we should demand more of the commissioned officers, who we as a nation empower to lead our sons and daughters into battle."
Indeed, and at best, the blatant malfeasance on the part of the individuals who composed this exercise reflects poorly on the uniformed services.
The antidote to this patent misrepresentation of peaceable Patriots is to expose it with the Light of Truth. As our motto Veritas vos Liberabit affirms, the Truth shall set you Free!
(Note: To report examples of politically motivated "exercises" in either the civilian or military sectors of our federal government, please contact us -- NewsTip@PatriotPost.US)
Semper Vigilo, Fortis, Paratus et Fidelis!
Mark Alexander
Publisher, PatriotPost.US
Click Here
TEA Party Movement
Find supplies for your local TEA party here from founding documents to stickers, flags and much more!
(To submit reader comments click here.)
*****
(Please pray for our Armed Forces standing in harm's way around the world, and for their families -- especially families of those fallen Soldiers, Sailors, Airmen, Marines and Coast Guardsmen, who granted their lives in defense of American liberty.)
Fan us on Facebook | Follow us on Twitter!
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The Patriot Post is protected speech pursuant to the "inalienable rights" of all men, and the First (and Second) Amendment to the Constitution of the United States of America. In God we trust. Copyright © 2010 The Patriot Post. All Rights Reserved.
REPRINTING, FORWARDING AND POSTING: Subscribers may reprint, forward or post original content from The Patriot Post, in whole or part, in accordance with our Terms of Use, with the following citation: "The Patriot Post (www.patriotpost.us/subscribe/ )"
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Alexander's Essay – April 29, 2010
Army Preps for Tea Party 'Terrorists'
"The duty imposed upon [the president] to take care, that the laws be faithfully executed, follows out the strong injunctions of his oath of office, that he will 'preserve, protect, and defend the constitution.' The great object of the executive department is to accomplish this purpose; and without it, be the form of government whatever it may, it will be utterly worthless for offence, or defence; for the redress of grievances, or the protection of rights; for the happiness, or good order, or safety of the people." --Justice Joseph Story
A few months back, the commander in chief or our Armed Forces, that erstwhile community organizer Barack Hussein Obama, denigrated a large cross section of Americans who identify with the Tea Party movement -- those who advocate for Essential Liberty and Rule of Law.
Obama identified them as malcontents, "waving their little tea bags."
Since then, the Obama administration and their Leftmedia sycophants have endeavored to characterize Tea Party attendees as rude, radical, racist, redneck, enemies of the state.
In fact, Americans who attend Tea Party rallies are from all walks of life, as noted in the Patriot Declaration, Patriots who are peacefully and constitutionally petitioning their government for redress.
As I noted in my tax-day essay, Tea Parties are "not a call for revolution but for restoration -- a call to undertake whatever measures are dictated by prudence and necessity to restore constitutional Rule of Law."
However, Obama's words do have consequences.
This week, I was contacted by a number of military personnel, enlisted and officer ranks, who expressed concern about a military exercise underway at Ft. Knox, the U.S. Bullion Depository. As with most such exercises, the Ft. Knox alert occurred in stages, as if real time intelligence was being provided at various intervals.
The first intel advisory was issued on Friday, 23 April 2010, and identifies the terrorist threat adversaries as "Local Militia Groups / Anti-Government Protesters / TEA Party."
You read that right: "TEA Party"!
The alert states that plans for the demonstration may have been interrupted by "Federal and local law enforcement" raids on a "White Supremacists Organization," but "TEA Party organizers have stated that they will protest at the Gold Vault at a future date."
Further, the intel advisory states, "Anti-Government - Health Care Protesters have stated that they would join the TEA Party as a sign of solidarity."
In accordance with the exercise, Ft. Knox post security is placed on high alert because, "these groups are armed, have combative training and some are former Military Snipers. Some may have explosives training / experience," and "a rally at their compound / training area is scheduled."
Another intel update was issued on Monday, 26 April 2010, noting that the "rally at the Militia compound occurred," and "Viable threats ... have been made." The intel on the rally notes, "Many members were extremely agitated at what they referred to as Government intervention and over taxation in their lives. Alcohol use 'fanned the flames.' Many military grade firearms were openly carried. An ad hoc 'shoot the government agent' event was held with prizes (alcohol) given for the best shot placement."
The report states further, "Components of bomb making are reported to have been on the site. Some members have criminal records relating to explosive and weapons violations."
In response to the "immediate threat," the exercise stipulates, "local detention centers are being made ready for mass arrests." Both the "QRF I and QRF II" are placed on two hour recall, and the "5-15 CAV" was ordered to "draw weapons from holder and store in most available arms room," and "coordinate with MASA for immediate ammunition draw; have equipment readied for immediate use, i.e. vehicles staged and loaded IAW 5-15 CAV SOP; LMR's charged."
QRF refers to Quick Reaction Force. QRF I is the 16th Cavalry Regiment. QRF II is the 194th Armored Brigade.
The 26 April order gives specific instructions for the 5-15 CAV (a 16th Cavalry battalion) to have weapons, ammo, vehicles and communications at ready, and it places the other 2,200 members of the units on two-hour recall. In other words, these orders are to gear up for defending Ft. Knox against Tea Party folks and their co-conspirators who oppose nationalization of our health care sector.
Now, for almost 30 years I have participated in the development and implementation of small and large scale military exercises within the U.S. and around the world.
Such exercises are critical to the readiness of our forces, and the standard for the real time intel reports in these drills requires thinly veiled references to assets of existing or collateral threat vectors such as communist regimes such as China and real terrorist networks such as al-Qa'ida, etc.
Perhaps the writers of such exercises today should focus on response plans for, say, an Islamic terrorist who attacks a post. (See Ft. Hood / Major Nidal Malik Hasan.)
The Ft. Knox exercise is not only amateurish in its construct, but also sets an ominous political precedent.
The military officers and enlisted personnel with whom I spoke are all dedicated uniformed Patriots who are loyal, first and foremost, to their oath to "support and defend" our Constitution "against all enemies, foreign and domestic."
Their concerns about this exercise mirrored my own. As one put it, the exercise "misrepresents freedom loving Americans as drunken, violent racists -- the opponents of Obama's policies have been made the enemy of the U.S. Army."
They were equally concerned that command staff at Ft. Knox had signed off on this exercise, noting, "it has been issued and owned by field grade officers who lead our battalions and brigades," which is to say many Lieutenant Colonels saw this order before it was implemented.
It's not likely that Ft. Knox Commanding General James Milano or Deputy Commander Col. David Teeples, or even the regimental and brigade commanders for the 16th Cav and 194th AB, actually read the exercise scenario, but that doesn't absolve responsibility for such an egregious example of political exploitation of U.S. forces.
One officer insisted, "The American people should require greater accountability of their commissioned officers, that they abide by their oath and never allow politically motivated propaganda like this exercise on any post or base again."
Another observed, "Whether this is complacency by officers who do not see such orders as a problem, or worse, officers who recognize the problem but do not insist the orders are changed, this is a serious problem. We are discussing the training of American citizen soldiers in the use of potentially deadly force against a specific group of political dissenters. There is never a time in an officer's career in which he does not have a duty to apply critical thought to the orders he is given and asked to give. It is my opinion that any officer that has allowed these orders to persist, to reach the level of junior officers and soldiers, has demonstrated a lack of judgment or apathy towards what his duty requires of him. Either way, we should demand more of the commissioned officers, who we as a nation empower to lead our sons and daughters into battle."
Indeed, and at best, the blatant malfeasance on the part of the individuals who composed this exercise reflects poorly on the uniformed services.
The antidote to this patent misrepresentation of peaceable Patriots is to expose it with the Light of Truth. As our motto Veritas vos Liberabit affirms, the Truth shall set you Free!
(Note: To report examples of politically motivated "exercises" in either the civilian or military sectors of our federal government, please contact us -- NewsTip@PatriotPost.US)
Semper Vigilo, Fortis, Paratus et Fidelis!
Mark Alexander
Publisher, PatriotPost.US
Click Here
TEA Party Movement
Find supplies for your local TEA party here from founding documents to stickers, flags and much more!
(To submit reader comments click here.)
*****
(Please pray for our Armed Forces standing in harm's way around the world, and for their families -- especially families of those fallen Soldiers, Sailors, Airmen, Marines and Coast Guardsmen, who granted their lives in defense of American liberty.)
Fan us on Facebook | Follow us on Twitter!
*PUBLIUS*
The Patriot Post is protected speech pursuant to the "inalienable rights" of all men, and the First (and Second) Amendment to the Constitution of the United States of America. In God we trust. Copyright © 2010 The Patriot Post. All Rights Reserved.
REPRINTING, FORWARDING AND POSTING: Subscribers may reprint, forward or post original content from The Patriot Post, in whole or part, in accordance with our Terms of Use, with the following citation: "The Patriot Post (www.patriotpost.us/subscribe/ )"
__________ Information from ESET Smart Security, version of virus signature database 5073 (20100429) __________
The message was checked by ESET Smart Security.
http://www.eset.com
Thursday, April 29, 2010
More than I ever dreamed of ... Softball
This may be somewhat controversial in this world of diversity. My naivette must show here. I played softball until I was becoming 75 two years ago. I was never aware of a gay player for or against any of the teams I was affiliated with. Oh well, read the fololowing at your own risk:
"The Homo Quota"—Inside The World Of Gay Softball
Earlier we wrote about three bisexual men suing the Gay World Series for excluding them because they "weren't gay enough." Let's examine the lengths organizers will go to to keep the sport gay, and how teams get around the rules.
The North American Gay Amateur Athletic Alliance has been the governing body for gay softball for the past 33 years, and the hard and fast rule is that each team can have a maximum of two heterosexual players on their roster. (According to the NAGAAA rules, heterosexual means "having a predominant sexual interest in a member or members of the opposite sex.")
The exemption exists for two reasons, says "Mike," a straight player for an Ohio team. "A lot of teams are concerned that they might not be able to field a full roster with just gays. It's easy enough to find a gay right fielder, but if you're in a smaller area, finding a pitcher or catcher who qualifies can be tougher. It just makes sense that if you've got seven guys who'd like to field a team, not to penalize them for not being able to find two more gay men."
And the second reason? It preemptively heads off claims of discrimination.
"They don't want to be sued," Mike says. "With this, they can say 'we let anyone play.'"
Because they're a private organization, the NAGAAA doesn't have to open membership to everyone. It's like Augusta National barring women until a few years ago, or, yes, like the Boy Scouts of America banning gay scoutmasters. But that's not an absolute defense, as lawsuits against Augusta, the Boy Scouts, and this week the NAGAAA, have shown.
Players have a love/hate relationship with the Homo Quota, as they call it. On one hand, they're happy to have a league for themselves, where they can comfortably be as out as they want to be. On the other hand, it seriously limits the talent pool. Those two "straight spots" are often used as ringers, and the more competitive teams will do whatever they can to find two great straight players — and occasionally more.
"We ended up losing one of our straight players because he got a girl pregnant," says "Rob," a gay player from Florida. "So I asked one of my straight friends to join our team and play outfield. After my team evaluated his performance they told me he could permanently join our team, but since he was only 'good,' but not 'really good,' he would have to 'be gay' in the eyes of the league because we didn't want to waste one of our straight spots on the roster on a straight player who is only pretty good."
Disguising straight ringers as gay men is fairly common practice in gay softball. According to the opposing team that filed the protest that led to the Seattle lawsuit, the three plaintiffs are actually heterosexual, and only claimed to be bisexual to skirt the two-player limit.
Teams will go to great lengths to cover up their players' heterosexuality, says Rob. "Each week, my other friend who doesn't play, shows up to the games as [the straight player's] 'boyfriend.' He is banned from my team of showing any signs of heterosexuality in public and even goes to a gay bar with me from time to time just to make an appearance."
The Homo Quota leads to gamesmanship, not only in smuggling straights onto your roster, but questioning players on other teams.
"After I'd played most of the teams," says Rob, "I found out from our team captain that the other teams were going to protest our wins because they thought that I was straight. I would have put us over the straight quota. So I wanted to know how exactly do I need to prove that I'm gay? Do I need to dance at a certain level, do I need to actually make out with men in front of a committee? I don't know what he ended up saying to stop them from protesting but they didn't go through with it."
Mike says that he's never been asked to pose as gay to free up a straight spot, but it's fairly common knowledge that a number of teams in his league pull that trick.
"It's not worth complaining," he says. "Some of my gay teammates know what it's like to be excluded because of who they are. How could they sleep at night if they turned around and did that to someone else?
"We're all just here to play softball with our friends."
Reasons the NAGAAA would discriminate against bisexuals?
a) switch-hitting
b) taking pitches the opposite way with power
c) drag bunting
d) beating out infield dribblers
e) double-headers
Softballing must not require such fundamentals. Reply
See 0 reply Hide 0 reply
Hit Bull Win Steak 04/23/10
There's an easy way to prove this. Just put them on the unpleasant side of a glory hole. Reply
See 0 reply Hide 0 reply
CaliCheeseSucks 04/23/10
I don't even think the true issue is the gay quota. It's that they won't allow bisexual players to play, essentially telling them, "Listen, you're either gay or you're straight."
"..how exactly do I need to prove that I'm gay? Do I need to dance at a certain level, do I need to actually make out with men in front of a committee?"
-Rawy Torres, 1989 Reply
See 0 reply Hide 0 reply
DirkToberFest 04/23/10
I think stories about gay people are hilarious.
Not because I enjoy laughing at gay people; I love gay people. But not like love love them like I'm gay or something.
Oh dear. I've really made a mess of this. Reply
See 0 reply Hide 0 reply
We Are All Lance Uppercut 04/23/10
It's easy enough to find a gay right fielder, but if you're in a smaller area, finding a pitcher or catcher who qualifies can be tougher.
Yeah, but if you're pitching it means you're not gay. Reply
OchentaYcinco 04/23/10
@We Are All Lance Uppercut: Just a bit too quick for me. On the other hand, how that joke went unmade for almost an hour is completely beyond me. Reply We Are All Lance Uppercut promoted this comment
We Are All Lance Uppercut 04/23/10
@OchentaYcinco: Right? It's like finding money on the sidewalk. Reply
OchentaYcinco 04/23/10
@We Are All Lance Uppercut: Exactly. You just need to be careful of your surroundings if you're gonna bend down to pick it up. Reply
See 3 replies Hide 3 replies bevraj of choice 04/23/10
What happens to gay men when they enter the realm of sports? You'd never see them missing a loophole in the fashion industry.
/Double checks for Freudian slips.
//Clicks 'Share' Reply
See 0 reply Hide 0 reply
Hatey McLife 04/23/10
This is a really sad story. Hopefully in a few years we won't have these divisions based on sexual preference.
With the promise of stem cell therapy, we can cure these people once and for all. Reply
DirkToberFest 04/23/10
@Hatey McLife: After that, we can work on the French. Reply
See 1 reply Hide 1 reply dont-forget-where-you-came-from-cheese mac 04/23/10
Let's examine the lengths organizers will go to to keep the sport gay Reply
See 0 reply Hide 0 reply
LatestBy 04/23/10
You're with me, Leatherdaddy. Reply
See 0 reply Hide 0 reply
FavreFAIL 04/23/10
I didn't realize they leaked the script to the next Bad News Bears film Reply
See 0 reply Hide 0 reply
MattinglysSideburns 04/23/10
"We're all just here to play softball with our friends."
- David J. Lesar on Halliburton's Iraq negotiations, 2002. Reply
Charisma 04/23/10
@MattinglysSideburns: Nice. Reply
See 1 reply Hide 1 reply Lionel Osbourne 04/23/10
I work hard and play hard for the Peter PanSexuals. Reply
Edited by Lionel Osbourne at 04/23/10 2:20 PM
See 0 reply Hide 0 reply
StuScott Booyahs 04/23/10
This would make a great movie starring Cuba Gooding, Jr. Reply
saltwatertaffy 04/23/10
@StuScott Booyahs: "The Switch Hitter". tagline: "Steppin' up to the plate just got complicated". Reply
StuScott Booyahs 04/23/10
@saltwatertaffy: Excellent. Reply
See 2 replies Hide 2 replies roland_t_flakfizer 04/23/10
...even goes to a gay bar with me from time to time just to make an appearance...
"This lesbian bar doesn't have a fire exit! Enjoy your deathtrap, ladies!" Reply
See 0 reply Hide 0 reply
BullfightsOnAcid 04/23/10
I thought Gay Softball was called Cricket. Reply
See 0 reply Hide 0 reply
Steve U 04/23/10
The Homo Quota
OK, so maybe I overuse the phrase "Bunburying." I hardly see any reason to call me out over it. Reply
See 0 reply Hide 0 reply
BullfightsOnAcid 04/23/10
Reply
Choire 04/23/10
@BullfightsOnAcid: YAYS!!! *CLAPS HANDS* Reply
See 1 reply Hide 1 reply Choire 04/23/10
I only clicked through on this post for pictures. And there are none? WTF PEOPLE. Reply
BullfightsOnAcid 04/23/10
@Choire: Reply
Choire 04/23/10
@BullfightsOnAcid: WHEE!!! Reply
See 2 replies Hide 2 replies Gilbert Publicly Funded Arenas 04/23/10
not to penalize them for not being able to find two more gay men
The RIAA used this same logic when awarding a platinum record to the Village People after only the 999,998th album sold. Reply
Steve U promoted this comment
See 0 reply Hide 0 reply
UkraineNotWeak 04/23/10
How do they keep score with so many balls in play? Reply
See 0 reply Hide 0 reply
rulesboy 04/23/10
It's easy enough to find a gay right fielder
Most commonly at Log Cabin Republican meetings. Reply
See 0 reply Hide 0 reply
Katni 04/23/10
This is just like the time I had to pretend to like Animal Collective in order to fill in on my friend's kickball team. Reply
ScientificMapp 04/23/10
@Katni: Nice. Reply
See 1 reply Hide 1 reply Dandy Koufax 04/23/10
NAGAAA, please. Reply
ArkansasFred 04/23/10
@Dandy Koufax: Awesome. Reply
Steve U 04/23/10
@Dandy Koufax: +1 Reply
bevraj of choice 04/23/10
@Dandy Koufax: Excellent +1 Reply
Gamboa Constrictor 04/23/10
@Dandy Koufax: This gave me that confused- look- that- slowly- turned- into- knowing- smile- and- slow- clap reaction that Conan is so fond of (I'm not that smart).Well done. Reply
ScientificMapp 04/23/10
@Gamboa Constrictor: Ditto Reply
See 5 replies Hide 5 replies Civil Negligence 04/23/10
Could you imagine the havoc A-Rod would wreck on this league should he decide to join? Reply
See 0 reply Hide 0 reply
"The Homo Quota"—Inside The World Of Gay Softball
Earlier we wrote about three bisexual men suing the Gay World Series for excluding them because they "weren't gay enough." Let's examine the lengths organizers will go to to keep the sport gay, and how teams get around the rules.
The North American Gay Amateur Athletic Alliance has been the governing body for gay softball for the past 33 years, and the hard and fast rule is that each team can have a maximum of two heterosexual players on their roster. (According to the NAGAAA rules, heterosexual means "having a predominant sexual interest in a member or members of the opposite sex.")
The exemption exists for two reasons, says "Mike," a straight player for an Ohio team. "A lot of teams are concerned that they might not be able to field a full roster with just gays. It's easy enough to find a gay right fielder, but if you're in a smaller area, finding a pitcher or catcher who qualifies can be tougher. It just makes sense that if you've got seven guys who'd like to field a team, not to penalize them for not being able to find two more gay men."
And the second reason? It preemptively heads off claims of discrimination.
"They don't want to be sued," Mike says. "With this, they can say 'we let anyone play.'"
Because they're a private organization, the NAGAAA doesn't have to open membership to everyone. It's like Augusta National barring women until a few years ago, or, yes, like the Boy Scouts of America banning gay scoutmasters. But that's not an absolute defense, as lawsuits against Augusta, the Boy Scouts, and this week the NAGAAA, have shown.
Players have a love/hate relationship with the Homo Quota, as they call it. On one hand, they're happy to have a league for themselves, where they can comfortably be as out as they want to be. On the other hand, it seriously limits the talent pool. Those two "straight spots" are often used as ringers, and the more competitive teams will do whatever they can to find two great straight players — and occasionally more.
"We ended up losing one of our straight players because he got a girl pregnant," says "Rob," a gay player from Florida. "So I asked one of my straight friends to join our team and play outfield. After my team evaluated his performance they told me he could permanently join our team, but since he was only 'good,' but not 'really good,' he would have to 'be gay' in the eyes of the league because we didn't want to waste one of our straight spots on the roster on a straight player who is only pretty good."
Disguising straight ringers as gay men is fairly common practice in gay softball. According to the opposing team that filed the protest that led to the Seattle lawsuit, the three plaintiffs are actually heterosexual, and only claimed to be bisexual to skirt the two-player limit.
Teams will go to great lengths to cover up their players' heterosexuality, says Rob. "Each week, my other friend who doesn't play, shows up to the games as [the straight player's] 'boyfriend.' He is banned from my team of showing any signs of heterosexuality in public and even goes to a gay bar with me from time to time just to make an appearance."
The Homo Quota leads to gamesmanship, not only in smuggling straights onto your roster, but questioning players on other teams.
"After I'd played most of the teams," says Rob, "I found out from our team captain that the other teams were going to protest our wins because they thought that I was straight. I would have put us over the straight quota. So I wanted to know how exactly do I need to prove that I'm gay? Do I need to dance at a certain level, do I need to actually make out with men in front of a committee? I don't know what he ended up saying to stop them from protesting but they didn't go through with it."
Mike says that he's never been asked to pose as gay to free up a straight spot, but it's fairly common knowledge that a number of teams in his league pull that trick.
"It's not worth complaining," he says. "Some of my gay teammates know what it's like to be excluded because of who they are. How could they sleep at night if they turned around and did that to someone else?
"We're all just here to play softball with our friends."
Reasons the NAGAAA would discriminate against bisexuals?
a) switch-hitting
b) taking pitches the opposite way with power
c) drag bunting
d) beating out infield dribblers
e) double-headers
Softballing must not require such fundamentals. Reply
See 0 reply Hide 0 reply
Hit Bull Win Steak 04/23/10
There's an easy way to prove this. Just put them on the unpleasant side of a glory hole. Reply
See 0 reply Hide 0 reply
CaliCheeseSucks 04/23/10
I don't even think the true issue is the gay quota. It's that they won't allow bisexual players to play, essentially telling them, "Listen, you're either gay or you're straight."
"..how exactly do I need to prove that I'm gay? Do I need to dance at a certain level, do I need to actually make out with men in front of a committee?"
-Rawy Torres, 1989 Reply
See 0 reply Hide 0 reply
DirkToberFest 04/23/10
I think stories about gay people are hilarious.
Not because I enjoy laughing at gay people; I love gay people. But not like love love them like I'm gay or something.
Oh dear. I've really made a mess of this. Reply
See 0 reply Hide 0 reply
We Are All Lance Uppercut 04/23/10
It's easy enough to find a gay right fielder, but if you're in a smaller area, finding a pitcher or catcher who qualifies can be tougher.
Yeah, but if you're pitching it means you're not gay. Reply
OchentaYcinco 04/23/10
@We Are All Lance Uppercut: Just a bit too quick for me. On the other hand, how that joke went unmade for almost an hour is completely beyond me. Reply We Are All Lance Uppercut promoted this comment
We Are All Lance Uppercut 04/23/10
@OchentaYcinco: Right? It's like finding money on the sidewalk. Reply
OchentaYcinco 04/23/10
@We Are All Lance Uppercut: Exactly. You just need to be careful of your surroundings if you're gonna bend down to pick it up. Reply
See 3 replies Hide 3 replies bevraj of choice 04/23/10
What happens to gay men when they enter the realm of sports? You'd never see them missing a loophole in the fashion industry.
/Double checks for Freudian slips.
//Clicks 'Share' Reply
See 0 reply Hide 0 reply
Hatey McLife 04/23/10
This is a really sad story. Hopefully in a few years we won't have these divisions based on sexual preference.
With the promise of stem cell therapy, we can cure these people once and for all. Reply
DirkToberFest 04/23/10
@Hatey McLife: After that, we can work on the French. Reply
See 1 reply Hide 1 reply dont-forget-where-you-came-from-cheese mac 04/23/10
Let's examine the lengths organizers will go to to keep the sport gay Reply
See 0 reply Hide 0 reply
LatestBy 04/23/10
You're with me, Leatherdaddy. Reply
See 0 reply Hide 0 reply
FavreFAIL 04/23/10
I didn't realize they leaked the script to the next Bad News Bears film Reply
See 0 reply Hide 0 reply
MattinglysSideburns 04/23/10
"We're all just here to play softball with our friends."
- David J. Lesar on Halliburton's Iraq negotiations, 2002. Reply
Charisma 04/23/10
@MattinglysSideburns: Nice. Reply
See 1 reply Hide 1 reply Lionel Osbourne 04/23/10
I work hard and play hard for the Peter PanSexuals. Reply
Edited by Lionel Osbourne at 04/23/10 2:20 PM
See 0 reply Hide 0 reply
StuScott Booyahs 04/23/10
This would make a great movie starring Cuba Gooding, Jr. Reply
saltwatertaffy 04/23/10
@StuScott Booyahs: "The Switch Hitter". tagline: "Steppin' up to the plate just got complicated". Reply
StuScott Booyahs 04/23/10
@saltwatertaffy: Excellent. Reply
See 2 replies Hide 2 replies roland_t_flakfizer 04/23/10
...even goes to a gay bar with me from time to time just to make an appearance...
"This lesbian bar doesn't have a fire exit! Enjoy your deathtrap, ladies!" Reply
See 0 reply Hide 0 reply
BullfightsOnAcid 04/23/10
I thought Gay Softball was called Cricket. Reply
See 0 reply Hide 0 reply
Steve U 04/23/10
The Homo Quota
OK, so maybe I overuse the phrase "Bunburying." I hardly see any reason to call me out over it. Reply
See 0 reply Hide 0 reply
BullfightsOnAcid 04/23/10
Reply
Choire 04/23/10
@BullfightsOnAcid: YAYS!!! *CLAPS HANDS* Reply
See 1 reply Hide 1 reply Choire 04/23/10
I only clicked through on this post for pictures. And there are none? WTF PEOPLE. Reply
BullfightsOnAcid 04/23/10
@Choire: Reply
Choire 04/23/10
@BullfightsOnAcid: WHEE!!! Reply
See 2 replies Hide 2 replies Gilbert Publicly Funded Arenas 04/23/10
not to penalize them for not being able to find two more gay men
The RIAA used this same logic when awarding a platinum record to the Village People after only the 999,998th album sold. Reply
Steve U promoted this comment
See 0 reply Hide 0 reply
UkraineNotWeak 04/23/10
How do they keep score with so many balls in play? Reply
See 0 reply Hide 0 reply
rulesboy 04/23/10
It's easy enough to find a gay right fielder
Most commonly at Log Cabin Republican meetings. Reply
See 0 reply Hide 0 reply
Katni 04/23/10
This is just like the time I had to pretend to like Animal Collective in order to fill in on my friend's kickball team. Reply
ScientificMapp 04/23/10
@Katni: Nice. Reply
See 1 reply Hide 1 reply Dandy Koufax 04/23/10
NAGAAA, please. Reply
ArkansasFred 04/23/10
@Dandy Koufax: Awesome. Reply
Steve U 04/23/10
@Dandy Koufax: +1 Reply
bevraj of choice 04/23/10
@Dandy Koufax: Excellent +1 Reply
Gamboa Constrictor 04/23/10
@Dandy Koufax: This gave me that confused- look- that- slowly- turned- into- knowing- smile- and- slow- clap reaction that Conan is so fond of (I'm not that smart).Well done. Reply
ScientificMapp 04/23/10
@Gamboa Constrictor: Ditto Reply
See 5 replies Hide 5 replies Civil Negligence 04/23/10
Could you imagine the havoc A-Rod would wreck on this league should he decide to join? Reply
See 0 reply Hide 0 reply
Thanks Jackie Brown- PHS 55 I think.
This one is a little different... .
Two Different Versions......................
Two Different Morals
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
OLD
VERSION
(The way it should be.)
The ant works
hard in the withering heat all summer long, building
his house and laying up supplies for the
winter.
The grasshopper thinks the ant is a fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer away...
Come winter, the ant is warm and well fed.
The grasshopper has no food or shelter, so he dies out in the cold.
MORAL OF THE STORY:
Be responsible for yourself!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
MODERN
VERSION
(The liberal/Progressive way today.)
The ant works
hard in the withering heat and the rain all summer
long, building his house and laying up supplies for
the winter.
The grasshopper thinks the ant is a fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer away.
Come winter, the shivering grasshopper calls
a press conference and demands to know why
the ant should be allowed to be warm and well fed while he is cold and starving.
CBS, NBC , PBS, CNN, and ABC
show up to provide pictures of the shivering grasshopper next
to a video of the ant in his comfortable home with a table filled with food.
Liberal America is stunned by the sharp contrast.
How can this be, that in a country of such wealth, this
poor grasshopper is allowed to suffer so?
Kermit the Frog appears on Oprah with the grasshopper and
everybody cries when they sing, 'It's Not Easy Being Green.'
ACORN stages a demonstration in front of the ant's house
where the news stations film the group singing,"We shall overcome." Then Rev. Jeremiah Wright has the group kneel down to pray to God for the grasshopper's sake.
President Obama condemns the ant and blames President
Bush, President Reagan, Christopher Columbus, and the
Pope for the grasshopper's plight.
Nancy Pelosi & Harry Reid exclaim in an interview with Larry
King that the ant has gotten rich off the back of the grasshopper, and both call for an immediate tax hike on the ant to make him pay his fair share.
Finally, the EEOC drafts the Economic Equality & Pro Grasshopper Act retroactive to the beginning of the
summer.
The ant is fined for failing to hire a proportionate number
of green bugs and, having nothing left to pay his retroactive taxes, his home is confiscated by the Government Green
Czar and given to the grasshopper.
The story ends as we see the grasshopper and his free-loading friends finishing up the last bits of the ant's food while the government house he is in, which, as you recall, just happens to be the ant's old house, crumbles around them because the
grasshopper doesn't maintain it.
The ant has disappeared in the snow, never to be seen
again.
The grasshopper is found dead in a drug related incident, and the house, now abandoned, is taken over by a gang of spiders who terrorize the ramshackle, once prosperous and once peaceful, neighborhood..
The entire Nation collapses bringing the rest of the free world with it.
MORAL OF THE STORY:
Be careful how you vote in 2010.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I've
sent this to you because I believe that you are
an ant -
not a grasshopper!
Make sure that you pass this on to
other ants.
Don't bother sending it on to any
grasshoppers because
they wouldn't understand it,
anyway.
Two Different Versions......................
Two Different Morals
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
OLD
VERSION
(The way it should be.)
The ant works
hard in the withering heat all summer long, building
his house and laying up supplies for the
winter.
The grasshopper thinks the ant is a fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer away...
Come winter, the ant is warm and well fed.
The grasshopper has no food or shelter, so he dies out in the cold.
MORAL OF THE STORY:
Be responsible for yourself!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
MODERN
VERSION
(The liberal/Progressive way today.)
The ant works
hard in the withering heat and the rain all summer
long, building his house and laying up supplies for
the winter.
The grasshopper thinks the ant is a fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer away.
Come winter, the shivering grasshopper calls
a press conference and demands to know why
the ant should be allowed to be warm and well fed while he is cold and starving.
CBS, NBC , PBS, CNN, and ABC
show up to provide pictures of the shivering grasshopper next
to a video of the ant in his comfortable home with a table filled with food.
Liberal America is stunned by the sharp contrast.
How can this be, that in a country of such wealth, this
poor grasshopper is allowed to suffer so?
Kermit the Frog appears on Oprah with the grasshopper and
everybody cries when they sing, 'It's Not Easy Being Green.'
ACORN stages a demonstration in front of the ant's house
where the news stations film the group singing,"We shall overcome." Then Rev. Jeremiah Wright has the group kneel down to pray to God for the grasshopper's sake.
President Obama condemns the ant and blames President
Bush, President Reagan, Christopher Columbus, and the
Pope for the grasshopper's plight.
Nancy Pelosi & Harry Reid exclaim in an interview with Larry
King that the ant has gotten rich off the back of the grasshopper, and both call for an immediate tax hike on the ant to make him pay his fair share.
Finally, the EEOC drafts the Economic Equality & Pro Grasshopper Act retroactive to the beginning of the
summer.
The ant is fined for failing to hire a proportionate number
of green bugs and, having nothing left to pay his retroactive taxes, his home is confiscated by the Government Green
Czar and given to the grasshopper.
The story ends as we see the grasshopper and his free-loading friends finishing up the last bits of the ant's food while the government house he is in, which, as you recall, just happens to be the ant's old house, crumbles around them because the
grasshopper doesn't maintain it.
The ant has disappeared in the snow, never to be seen
again.
The grasshopper is found dead in a drug related incident, and the house, now abandoned, is taken over by a gang of spiders who terrorize the ramshackle, once prosperous and once peaceful, neighborhood..
The entire Nation collapses bringing the rest of the free world with it.
MORAL OF THE STORY:
Be careful how you vote in 2010.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I've
sent this to you because I believe that you are
an ant -
not a grasshopper!
Make sure that you pass this on to
other ants.
Don't bother sending it on to any
grasshoppers because
they wouldn't understand it,
anyway.
Test- Terri Kushner CSCC Math Instructor
I passed the tst, Terri. thanks!
I wuz wr'd that, at 77, I may be rrroppchg Al Z Heimers.
Sam
----- Original Message -----
From: Theresa Kusner
ime
Subj: Fw: Test ! YES
I don't know the validity of this thing, but it's fun...
A Short Neurological Test
1- Find the C below.. Please do not use any cursor help.
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOCOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
2- If you already found the C, now find the 6 below.
99999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999
99999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999
99999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999
69999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999
99999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999
99999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999
3 - Now find the N below. It's a little more difficult.
MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMNMM
MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM
MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM
MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM
MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM
This is NOT a joke. If you were able to pass these 3 tests, you can cancel your annual visit to your neurologist. Your brain is great and you're far from having a close relationship with Alzheimer.
Congratulations!
-------
eonvrye that can raed this rsaie your hnad.
To my 'selected' strange-minded friends:
If you can read the following paragraph, forward it on to your friends and the person that sent it to you with 'yes' in the subject line.
Only great minds can read this
This is weird, but interesting!
If you can raed this, you have a sgtrane mnid too
Can you raed this? Olny 55 plepoe out of 100 can.
I cdnuolt blveiee that I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd what I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid, aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it dseno't mtaetr in what oerdr the ltteres in a word are, the olny iproamtnt tihng is that the frsit and last ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can still raed it whotuit a pboerlm. This is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the word as a wlohe. Azanmig huh? Yaeh and I awlyas tghuhot slpeling was ipmorantt! If you can raed this forwrad it
FORWARD ONLY IF YOU CAN READ IT
(how did you do?)
I wuz wr'd that, at 77, I may be rrroppchg Al Z Heimers.
Sam
----- Original Message -----
From: Theresa Kusner
ime
Subj: Fw: Test ! YES
I don't know the validity of this thing, but it's fun...
A Short Neurological Test
1- Find the C below.. Please do not use any cursor help.
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOCOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
2- If you already found the C, now find the 6 below.
99999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999
99999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999
99999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999
69999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999
99999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999
99999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999
3 - Now find the N below. It's a little more difficult.
MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMNMM
MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM
MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM
MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM
MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM
This is NOT a joke. If you were able to pass these 3 tests, you can cancel your annual visit to your neurologist. Your brain is great and you're far from having a close relationship with Alzheimer.
Congratulations!
-------
eonvrye that can raed this rsaie your hnad.
To my 'selected' strange-minded friends:
If you can read the following paragraph, forward it on to your friends and the person that sent it to you with 'yes' in the subject line.
Only great minds can read this
This is weird, but interesting!
If you can raed this, you have a sgtrane mnid too
Can you raed this? Olny 55 plepoe out of 100 can.
I cdnuolt blveiee that I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd what I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid, aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it dseno't mtaetr in what oerdr the ltteres in a word are, the olny iproamtnt tihng is that the frsit and last ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can still raed it whotuit a pboerlm. This is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the word as a wlohe. Azanmig huh? Yaeh and I awlyas tghuhot slpeling was ipmorantt! If you can raed this forwrad it
FORWARD ONLY IF YOU CAN READ IT
(how did you do?)
"Why Jews are basically liberal" JWR
I am far from becoming a Jew in religion; however, I find the following an interesting article, which actually wonders that the Jewish vote is leberal:
Jewish World Review
The real reason why Jews are liberals
By Rabbi Yonason Goldson
A few reflections on the politics of freedom that answer the most frequently asked question this site receives
http://www.JewishWorldReview.com | Now that even the New York Times has acknowledged Barack Obama's confrontational stance toward the State of Israel, one might wonder why American Jews have yet to demonstrate even a hint of buyer's remorse over their ardent support for the president in the last general election. Long-time Commentary Magazine editor Norman Podhoretz wondered the same thing in a Wall Street Journal editorial last September, in which he posed the title question, "Why are Jews Liberals?"
The article — then a teaser for the author's new book by the same name — never got around to answering its own question. Indeed, Mr. Podhoretz seemed distinctly less interested in contemplating why Jews are liberal than in pontificating about why they should be more conservative.
He has a point. For over three thousand years, Jewish society has promoted what today are called "traditional values," those social mores that came to define "tradition" precisely because they were universally held by so many for so long. The sanctity of life, of family, of sexuality, of charity, and of prayer — all these find their origins in Torah Judaism. Moreover, throughout the Biblical and Talmudic eras the structure of the Jewish socioeconomic community was essentially capitalistic, with the free market determining business activity and the social safety net for the poor and the weak provided (successfully) by individual responsibility within a framework of communal obligation.
Why then, asked Mr. Podhoretz, have American Jews indulged their love affair with liberalism since Franklin Roosevelt (who demurred from even a token act of intervention on behalf of the 6 million Jews murdered by the Nazis)? Why did American Jews disregard John McCain's long record of support for Israel and Barack Obama's open association with known anti-Semites to vote for Mr. Obama by a margin of almost five-to-one? (And why, I might add, if the vote were held today, would the likely results be just about the same?)
Good questions. And although Mr. Podhoretz sidestepped any effort to answer them, there is an answer.
STRANGE BEDFELLOWS
As much as all conservative values trace their origins to Jewish tradition, liberal values trace their origins to the same source — to exactly the same degree.
No one has articulated this better than the non-Jewish historian Paul Johnson: "To [the Jews] we owe the idea of equality before the law, both divine and human; of the sanctity of life and the dignity of human person; of the individual conscience and so a personal redemption; of collective conscience and so of social responsibility; of peace as an abstract ideal and love as the foundation of justice, and many other items which constitute the basic moral furniture of the human mind." In other words, Judaism is an ideology devoted to the betterment of the human condition based upon values and goals that are fundamentally liberal.
That being said, it may be the greatest misconception of the modern ideological divide that conservatism and liberalism must be mutually exclusive. Conservative traditionalism emphasizes the necessity of building upon the past, while liberal idealism focuses upon the responsibility to shape the future. Conservatism without forward thinking becomes calcified and reactionary. Liberalism without respect for tradition mutates into caricature and absurdity.
The corruption of modern liberalism is evident across the spectrum of political ideology. The sanctity of life has devolved into the rejection of capital punishment while simultaneously negating both the value and the rights of the unborn. The dignity of human person has been distorted to support euthanasia for both unwanted infants and the elderly infirm. Equality before the law has become a bludgeon in the hands of criminals and a straightjacket to constrain victims. Collective conscience has become the underpinning of nonjudgmentalism, whereby every form of perversion gains acceptance as an "alternative lifestyle." The notion of divinity has vanished altogether, replaced by the self-worship of secular humanism.
Oblivious to these resounding contradictions, secular Jews have rallied to modern liberalism under the banner of tikkun olam, literally "the rectification of the world." In its new, common usage, however, tikkun olam means something very different from what it meant when the concept was first articulated over 32 centuries ago.
TO REPAIR THE WORLD
Advocacy for saving the rainforests and for saving the whales, for developing renewable resources and for leaving a smaller carbon footprint — these are just some of the enterprises gathered by pop-Jewish philosophy under the umbrella of tikkun olam. According to the ancient wisdom of the Torah, however, every human being is a microcosm of Creation, a world — or olam — unto himself. Yes, it is important for human beings to act as responsible custodians of the Almighty's world, but the rectification of the universe is a process that ultimately begins and ends within oneself.
How does an individual repair himself and thereby bring his world a step closer to perfection? By cultivating moral behavior and spiritual sensitivity based upon traditional values through acts of kindness, charity, and spiritual self-discipline. When I change myself, I change the world around me, and I do so far more substantially than by trying to change others while I remain the same. My own mandate to repair the world rests upon me alone and can be delegated to no one else.
Modern liberalism has adopted the belief that change depends upon governmental and judicial activism. Ironically, by shifting responsibility for social justice from the individual to the state, modern liberals have abdicated their own responsibility to address the very injustices they yearn to change. And with the abdication of social responsibility, it requires only a short step before even the most basic moral and spiritual axioms are similarly discarded. Finally, with no moral compass to guide it, modern liberalism has embraced the amorality of ancient Greece and the bacchanalia of ancient Rome not only as lifestyles but as models in the image of which contemporary society should be remade.
In truth, the liberal impulse is not only healthy but integral to human existence in general and to the mission of the Jewish people in particular. That impulse proves beneficial, however, only when guided by fealty toward the traditional values that have become associated with conservatism. By cutting themselves off from their spiritual moorings, secular Jews have indeed become the most exuberant seekers of causes for social and environmental justice as they seek any available ism to replace the calling of their ancestral heritage. But their headlong stampede toward utopianism more often resembles the frantic race of lemmings to the sea than an effective campaign for global reconstruction.
Mr. Podhoretz wonders at the alliance of American Jews with the liberal apologists who level every imaginable indictment against the country that granted them the freedom to achieve unprecedented prosperity. In the aftermath of the Passover holiday, it is worth reflecting upon the Jewish concept of freedom. To be truly free, we have to define morality not according to passing fads and fancies but according to the precepts that determine who we are and from where we have come. Only when we fully understand and commit ourselves to the principles that have sustained us since the dawn of civilization can we truly repair the world.
Jewish World Review
The real reason why Jews are liberals
By Rabbi Yonason Goldson
A few reflections on the politics of freedom that answer the most frequently asked question this site receives
http://www.JewishWorldReview.com | Now that even the New York Times has acknowledged Barack Obama's confrontational stance toward the State of Israel, one might wonder why American Jews have yet to demonstrate even a hint of buyer's remorse over their ardent support for the president in the last general election. Long-time Commentary Magazine editor Norman Podhoretz wondered the same thing in a Wall Street Journal editorial last September, in which he posed the title question, "Why are Jews Liberals?"
The article — then a teaser for the author's new book by the same name — never got around to answering its own question. Indeed, Mr. Podhoretz seemed distinctly less interested in contemplating why Jews are liberal than in pontificating about why they should be more conservative.
He has a point. For over three thousand years, Jewish society has promoted what today are called "traditional values," those social mores that came to define "tradition" precisely because they were universally held by so many for so long. The sanctity of life, of family, of sexuality, of charity, and of prayer — all these find their origins in Torah Judaism. Moreover, throughout the Biblical and Talmudic eras the structure of the Jewish socioeconomic community was essentially capitalistic, with the free market determining business activity and the social safety net for the poor and the weak provided (successfully) by individual responsibility within a framework of communal obligation.
Why then, asked Mr. Podhoretz, have American Jews indulged their love affair with liberalism since Franklin Roosevelt (who demurred from even a token act of intervention on behalf of the 6 million Jews murdered by the Nazis)? Why did American Jews disregard John McCain's long record of support for Israel and Barack Obama's open association with known anti-Semites to vote for Mr. Obama by a margin of almost five-to-one? (And why, I might add, if the vote were held today, would the likely results be just about the same?)
Good questions. And although Mr. Podhoretz sidestepped any effort to answer them, there is an answer.
STRANGE BEDFELLOWS
As much as all conservative values trace their origins to Jewish tradition, liberal values trace their origins to the same source — to exactly the same degree.
No one has articulated this better than the non-Jewish historian Paul Johnson: "To [the Jews] we owe the idea of equality before the law, both divine and human; of the sanctity of life and the dignity of human person; of the individual conscience and so a personal redemption; of collective conscience and so of social responsibility; of peace as an abstract ideal and love as the foundation of justice, and many other items which constitute the basic moral furniture of the human mind." In other words, Judaism is an ideology devoted to the betterment of the human condition based upon values and goals that are fundamentally liberal.
That being said, it may be the greatest misconception of the modern ideological divide that conservatism and liberalism must be mutually exclusive. Conservative traditionalism emphasizes the necessity of building upon the past, while liberal idealism focuses upon the responsibility to shape the future. Conservatism without forward thinking becomes calcified and reactionary. Liberalism without respect for tradition mutates into caricature and absurdity.
The corruption of modern liberalism is evident across the spectrum of political ideology. The sanctity of life has devolved into the rejection of capital punishment while simultaneously negating both the value and the rights of the unborn. The dignity of human person has been distorted to support euthanasia for both unwanted infants and the elderly infirm. Equality before the law has become a bludgeon in the hands of criminals and a straightjacket to constrain victims. Collective conscience has become the underpinning of nonjudgmentalism, whereby every form of perversion gains acceptance as an "alternative lifestyle." The notion of divinity has vanished altogether, replaced by the self-worship of secular humanism.
Oblivious to these resounding contradictions, secular Jews have rallied to modern liberalism under the banner of tikkun olam, literally "the rectification of the world." In its new, common usage, however, tikkun olam means something very different from what it meant when the concept was first articulated over 32 centuries ago.
TO REPAIR THE WORLD
Advocacy for saving the rainforests and for saving the whales, for developing renewable resources and for leaving a smaller carbon footprint — these are just some of the enterprises gathered by pop-Jewish philosophy under the umbrella of tikkun olam. According to the ancient wisdom of the Torah, however, every human being is a microcosm of Creation, a world — or olam — unto himself. Yes, it is important for human beings to act as responsible custodians of the Almighty's world, but the rectification of the universe is a process that ultimately begins and ends within oneself.
How does an individual repair himself and thereby bring his world a step closer to perfection? By cultivating moral behavior and spiritual sensitivity based upon traditional values through acts of kindness, charity, and spiritual self-discipline. When I change myself, I change the world around me, and I do so far more substantially than by trying to change others while I remain the same. My own mandate to repair the world rests upon me alone and can be delegated to no one else.
Modern liberalism has adopted the belief that change depends upon governmental and judicial activism. Ironically, by shifting responsibility for social justice from the individual to the state, modern liberals have abdicated their own responsibility to address the very injustices they yearn to change. And with the abdication of social responsibility, it requires only a short step before even the most basic moral and spiritual axioms are similarly discarded. Finally, with no moral compass to guide it, modern liberalism has embraced the amorality of ancient Greece and the bacchanalia of ancient Rome not only as lifestyles but as models in the image of which contemporary society should be remade.
In truth, the liberal impulse is not only healthy but integral to human existence in general and to the mission of the Jewish people in particular. That impulse proves beneficial, however, only when guided by fealty toward the traditional values that have become associated with conservatism. By cutting themselves off from their spiritual moorings, secular Jews have indeed become the most exuberant seekers of causes for social and environmental justice as they seek any available ism to replace the calling of their ancestral heritage. But their headlong stampede toward utopianism more often resembles the frantic race of lemmings to the sea than an effective campaign for global reconstruction.
Mr. Podhoretz wonders at the alliance of American Jews with the liberal apologists who level every imaginable indictment against the country that granted them the freedom to achieve unprecedented prosperity. In the aftermath of the Passover holiday, it is worth reflecting upon the Jewish concept of freedom. To be truly free, we have to define morality not according to passing fads and fancies but according to the precepts that determine who we are and from where we have come. Only when we fully understand and commit ourselves to the principles that have sustained us since the dawn of civilization can we truly repair the world.
Wednesday, April 28, 2010
o and the supposed Muslim heritage in America
----- Original Message -----
From: Joyce Smallwood
From: Terry Minch
Sent: Monday, April 26, 2010 1:30 PM
Subject: FW: An answer to Obama.......
This isn't bashing the President because of his political party, but it's historically accurate about our history and his remarks concerning the history of our country.
I don't like what he said, and I doubt if very many Americans agreed with his remarks regardless of their political affiliation.
Terry
Ain't it the truth!
I personally DO respect everyone's right to freely pray their faith. I don't respect those whose faith leads them to kill others who don't share their particular faith.
Our glorious President visited the Muslim world and told them how much the United States has been enriched by our Muslim Heritage. Evidently Mr. Wonderful hit a raw nerve with one fellow American that seems to know more about our nation's History than our President, (son of a non-American Kenyan).
I don't know who wrote the following, but he copied just about everybody including our Florida representatives and all the media outlets. Read on.
Barack OBAMA, during his Cairo speech, said: "I know, too, that Islam has always been a part of America 's story."
AN AMERICAN CITIZEN'S RESPONSE:
Mr. Obama:
Were those Muslims that were in America when the Pilgrims first landed? Funny, I thought they were Native American Indians.
Were those Muslims that celebrated the first Thanksgiving day? Sorry again, those were Pilgrims and Native American Indians.
Can you show me one Muslim signature on the United States Constitution?
Declaration of Independence ?
Bill of Rights?
Didn't think so.
Did Muslims fight for this country's freedom from England ? No..
Did Muslims fight during the Civil War to free the slaves in America ? No, they did not. In fact, Muslims to this day are still the largest traffickers in human slavery. Your own half brother, a devout Muslim, still advocates slavery himself, even though Muslims of Arabic descent refer to black Muslims as "pug nosed slaves." Says a lot of what the Muslim world really thinks of your family's "rich Islamic heritage," doesn't it Mr. Obama?
Where were Muslims during the Civil Rights era of this country? Not present.
There are no pictures or media accounts of Muslims walking side by side with Martin Luther King, Jr. or helping to advance the cause of Civil Rights.
Where were Muslims during this country's Woman's Suffrage era? Again, not present. In fact, devout Muslims demand that women are subservient to men in the Islamic culture. So much so, that often they are beaten for not wearing the 'hajib' or for talking to a man who is not a direct family member or their husband. Yep, the Muslims are all for women's rights, aren't they?
Where were Muslims during World War II? They were aligned with Adolf Hitler. The Muslim grand mufti himself met with Adolf Hitler, reviewed the troops and accepted support from the Nazi's in killing Jews.
Finally, Mr. Obama, where were Muslims on Sept. 11th, 2001? If they weren't flying planes into the World Trade Center , the Pentagon or a field in Pennsylvania killing nearly 3,000 people on our own soil, they were rejoicing in the Middle East . No one can dispute the pictures shown from all parts of the Muslim world celebrating on CNN, Fox News, MSNBC and other cable news network’s that day. Strangely, the very "moderate" Muslims who's asses you bent over backwards to kiss in Cairo , Egypt on June 4th were stone cold silent post 9-11. To many Americans, their silence has meant approval for the acts of that day.
And THAT, Mr. Obama, is the "rich heritage" Muslims have here in America .
Oh, I'm sorry, I forgot to mention the Barbary Pirates. They were Muslim.
And now we can add November 5, 2009 - the slaughter of American soldiers at Fort Hood by a Muslim major who is a doctor and a psychiatrist who was supposed to be counseling soldiers returning from battle in Iraq and Afghanistan .
That, Mr. Obama is the "Muslim heritage" in America .
EVERY AMERICAN MUST
READ THIS !!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
No virus found in this incoming message.
Checked by AVG - www.avg.com
Version: 8.5.437 / Virus Database: 271.1.1/2827 - Release Date: 04/21/10 18:31:00
From: Joyce Smallwood
From: Terry Minch
Sent: Monday, April 26, 2010 1:30 PM
Subject: FW: An answer to Obama.......
This isn't bashing the President because of his political party, but it's historically accurate about our history and his remarks concerning the history of our country.
I don't like what he said, and I doubt if very many Americans agreed with his remarks regardless of their political affiliation.
Terry
Ain't it the truth!
I personally DO respect everyone's right to freely pray their faith. I don't respect those whose faith leads them to kill others who don't share their particular faith.
Our glorious President visited the Muslim world and told them how much the United States has been enriched by our Muslim Heritage. Evidently Mr. Wonderful hit a raw nerve with one fellow American that seems to know more about our nation's History than our President, (son of a non-American Kenyan).
I don't know who wrote the following, but he copied just about everybody including our Florida representatives and all the media outlets. Read on.
Barack OBAMA, during his Cairo speech, said: "I know, too, that Islam has always been a part of America 's story."
AN AMERICAN CITIZEN'S RESPONSE:
Mr. Obama:
Were those Muslims that were in America when the Pilgrims first landed? Funny, I thought they were Native American Indians.
Were those Muslims that celebrated the first Thanksgiving day? Sorry again, those were Pilgrims and Native American Indians.
Can you show me one Muslim signature on the United States Constitution?
Declaration of Independence ?
Bill of Rights?
Didn't think so.
Did Muslims fight for this country's freedom from England ? No..
Did Muslims fight during the Civil War to free the slaves in America ? No, they did not. In fact, Muslims to this day are still the largest traffickers in human slavery. Your own half brother, a devout Muslim, still advocates slavery himself, even though Muslims of Arabic descent refer to black Muslims as "pug nosed slaves." Says a lot of what the Muslim world really thinks of your family's "rich Islamic heritage," doesn't it Mr. Obama?
Where were Muslims during the Civil Rights era of this country? Not present.
There are no pictures or media accounts of Muslims walking side by side with Martin Luther King, Jr. or helping to advance the cause of Civil Rights.
Where were Muslims during this country's Woman's Suffrage era? Again, not present. In fact, devout Muslims demand that women are subservient to men in the Islamic culture. So much so, that often they are beaten for not wearing the 'hajib' or for talking to a man who is not a direct family member or their husband. Yep, the Muslims are all for women's rights, aren't they?
Where were Muslims during World War II? They were aligned with Adolf Hitler. The Muslim grand mufti himself met with Adolf Hitler, reviewed the troops and accepted support from the Nazi's in killing Jews.
Finally, Mr. Obama, where were Muslims on Sept. 11th, 2001? If they weren't flying planes into the World Trade Center , the Pentagon or a field in Pennsylvania killing nearly 3,000 people on our own soil, they were rejoicing in the Middle East . No one can dispute the pictures shown from all parts of the Muslim world celebrating on CNN, Fox News, MSNBC and other cable news network’s that day. Strangely, the very "moderate" Muslims who's asses you bent over backwards to kiss in Cairo , Egypt on June 4th were stone cold silent post 9-11. To many Americans, their silence has meant approval for the acts of that day.
And THAT, Mr. Obama, is the "rich heritage" Muslims have here in America .
Oh, I'm sorry, I forgot to mention the Barbary Pirates. They were Muslim.
And now we can add November 5, 2009 - the slaughter of American soldiers at Fort Hood by a Muslim major who is a doctor and a psychiatrist who was supposed to be counseling soldiers returning from battle in Iraq and Afghanistan .
That, Mr. Obama is the "Muslim heritage" in America .
EVERY AMERICAN MUST
READ THIS !!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
No virus found in this incoming message.
Checked by AVG - www.avg.com
Version: 8.5.437 / Virus Database: 271.1.1/2827 - Release Date: 04/21/10 18:31:00
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